January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels....."duh".....bottles won't fit in typewriter!!!

March - Got excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months....box said "2-4 years!"

April - Trapped on escalator for hours.....power went out!!!

May - Tried to make Kool-Aid.....8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!

June - Tried to go water skiing.....couldn't find a lake with a slope.

July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....learned later, other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!

August - Got locked out of car in rain storm.....car swamped, because top was down.

September - The capital of California is "C".....isn't it???

October - Hate M &M's.....they are so hard to peel.

November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days.....instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!!

December - Couldn't call 911....."duh".....there's no "eleven" button on the phone!!!

What a year!!

 

Blondes get all the dates, blondes have all the fun. You men just make up these silly jokes so your wives don't notice you noticing them. Ask me how I know this.

 

How do you know this?

 

I was a brunette in a past lonely, sad life where I was expected to have a brain, think, multitask, etc. I went blonde and my social calendar immediately filled, nobody asks me to think, everybody rushes to my poor little blonde aid and my husband feeds me bonbons and buys me little baubles. Its a tough life, but I'd recommend it to any of my female friends.

 

That is a classic case of bait and switch. You should be ashamed of yourself..

 

WHAT!!! No snappy retort??? I was expecting more from you, our resident snappy retorter.

 

Go back and look at my post again.

 

She's still reading it..

 

Good one.


Now, you know I love you Valentine. It was just a good reply.

 

^^I should expect no less. That is an example of a re-post by edit. Shame on you. I may be blonde, but I still have the brunette brain. I just save it for when I really need it.