ATTEN Led!
Registered User
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 28,591
Likes: 0
From: G'day, mate!
Originally Posted by Ledfoot,Apr 10 2007, 06:29 PM
Maybe I should just grab you by the head and hold you over a vagina shouting "THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU!!!......THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU!!!!"
Hi Mom! 
nIce to know yur still alive 
Moderator
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 109,425
Likes: 1,648
From: SJC
All I'll mention is, I'm assumed gay until proven otherwise.
Maybe I need to stop knowing all those showtunes. . .wait, I have a Music degree.
Maybe I shouldn't have gotten the hi-lites in the hair. . . wait, I'm going grey.
Maybe I shouldn't have bought the Borns and the Italian loafers. . . well, alright, I've got nothing there.
Maybe I should be spotted with a girl. . . well, that doesn't do anything one way or the other.
Maybe I shouldn't be going to the gym. . . wait, I'm a lard ass, and would like to live to see 75.
Maybe I should bag the beard and goatee. . . wait, what about my double-chin?
I'm a freakin' Bear, and there ain't a GD thing I can do about it. I should just go buy that Beetle convertible.
Maybe I need to stop knowing all those showtunes. . .wait, I have a Music degree.
Maybe I shouldn't have gotten the hi-lites in the hair. . . wait, I'm going grey.
Maybe I shouldn't have bought the Borns and the Italian loafers. . . well, alright, I've got nothing there.
Maybe I should be spotted with a girl. . . well, that doesn't do anything one way or the other.
Maybe I shouldn't be going to the gym. . . wait, I'm a lard ass, and would like to live to see 75.
Maybe I should bag the beard and goatee. . . wait, what about my double-chin?
I'm a freakin' Bear, and there ain't a GD thing I can do about it. I should just go buy that Beetle convertible.
Registered User
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 12,891
Likes: 0
From: Port-au-Prince, Haiti
More fun with 7-11
*Those of you who know my record are aware of the fact that I have a love/hate relationship with 7-11. Some of the customers of these fine establishments have the shittiest manners of anybody I encounter briefly. Now, say what you want about my potty mouth, but I don
*Those of you who know my record are aware of the fact that I have a love/hate relationship with 7-11. Some of the customers of these fine establishments have the shittiest manners of anybody I encounter briefly. Now, say what you want about my potty mouth, but I don
Registered User
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 12,891
Likes: 0
From: Port-au-Prince, Haiti
*Oh...there's one other thing about the gay male population that occasionally gets on my nerves....
They get away with absolute focking murder!
If a straight guy went up to a girl he knew at a bar and just started dry-humping her leg like a poodle in heat, I'm pretty friggin sure he'd get a nice, knee-shaped indent permanently embedded in his nut sack. Ladies....I'm begging you here. Could you please treat ALL dumbsticks the same?...... Please? I'm compelled to say this because of the countless times I have had to watch gay guys cop the raunchiest of public feels on their female friends...It's UNREAL! .......DUDE!... I thought you craved the totem pole!?! If that's the case, then what is with the constant need to rub your face in that girl's ass while she's looking for her purse? Why are you "tuning in Tokyo" every five minutes? How in bloody hell do you get away with this bullshit?!
And it's always the same excuse that apparently has been nutured by the fine ladies of this country: "Oh, but he's just gay! He isn't getting off on this! He's just being friendly!"
:smacks head:
I've seen gay guys rubbing cleavage down with ice cubes... licking girls' necks....all in a public setting in front of dozens of people...and...and........ nothing... Aboslutely nothing happens to them... They get an "Oh you!", a slap on the wrist, and then they're back at it again!.. There they go!....Humping you ladies while complementing you on your lovely outfit. What the fock? If I tried to "woo" a woman in this fashion I'd get f-ing dragged out of the bar in cuffs!
I mean... think about it... Can a guy go up to another guy and mock-screw the ass of his jeans, scott-free, based on "Oh!...He's not enjoying himself! He's straight! This is just some form of bonding!"
....Good lord....
So here's the deal, ladies! Dumbsticks for Dumbsticks! If you let your gay friends toy with your tah-tahs in a way you wouldn't want mailed to your mother in polaroid format, you are under a moral obligation to let your straight male friends motorboat'em too! Hell, you need to let your female friends do it as well! I mean, c'mon now!..... Give a man some hope! It is devestating to every red-blooded, straight, wannabe-gentleman out there who has to sit with his drink and watch your "shopping buddies from The GAP", Rodd and Lance, have at you like they've won closet rights to your body in a game of Spin The Bottle.... They will accomplish in one Apple Martini's time what many straight guys can't pull off in a solid month...and all because they claim to be more interested in eachother's balloon knots than your holiest of holies. If this was truly the case, wouldn't they be bumping and grinding eachother instead of spit-polishing your knockers???? Hmmm????
Tell me I am not the only person who finds this both ironic.....and utterly daft....*
They get away with absolute focking murder!
If a straight guy went up to a girl he knew at a bar and just started dry-humping her leg like a poodle in heat, I'm pretty friggin sure he'd get a nice, knee-shaped indent permanently embedded in his nut sack. Ladies....I'm begging you here. Could you please treat ALL dumbsticks the same?...... Please? I'm compelled to say this because of the countless times I have had to watch gay guys cop the raunchiest of public feels on their female friends...It's UNREAL! .......DUDE!... I thought you craved the totem pole!?! If that's the case, then what is with the constant need to rub your face in that girl's ass while she's looking for her purse? Why are you "tuning in Tokyo" every five minutes? How in bloody hell do you get away with this bullshit?!
And it's always the same excuse that apparently has been nutured by the fine ladies of this country: "Oh, but he's just gay! He isn't getting off on this! He's just being friendly!"
:smacks head:
I've seen gay guys rubbing cleavage down with ice cubes... licking girls' necks....all in a public setting in front of dozens of people...and...and........ nothing... Aboslutely nothing happens to them... They get an "Oh you!", a slap on the wrist, and then they're back at it again!.. There they go!....Humping you ladies while complementing you on your lovely outfit. What the fock? If I tried to "woo" a woman in this fashion I'd get f-ing dragged out of the bar in cuffs!
I mean... think about it... Can a guy go up to another guy and mock-screw the ass of his jeans, scott-free, based on "Oh!...He's not enjoying himself! He's straight! This is just some form of bonding!"
....Good lord....
So here's the deal, ladies! Dumbsticks for Dumbsticks! If you let your gay friends toy with your tah-tahs in a way you wouldn't want mailed to your mother in polaroid format, you are under a moral obligation to let your straight male friends motorboat'em too! Hell, you need to let your female friends do it as well! I mean, c'mon now!..... Give a man some hope! It is devestating to every red-blooded, straight, wannabe-gentleman out there who has to sit with his drink and watch your "shopping buddies from The GAP", Rodd and Lance, have at you like they've won closet rights to your body in a game of Spin The Bottle.... They will accomplish in one Apple Martini's time what many straight guys can't pull off in a solid month...and all because they claim to be more interested in eachother's balloon knots than your holiest of holies. If this was truly the case, wouldn't they be bumping and grinding eachother instead of spit-polishing your knockers???? Hmmm????
Tell me I am not the only person who finds this both ironic.....and utterly daft....*
