Choose your favourites from these:

http://english2american.com/index.html#index

 

nonce n child-molestor. The term may originate from when sex offenders were admitted as "non-specified offenders" (thereby "non-specified" and thence "nonce") in the hope that they might not get the harsh treatment metered out to such convicts. It may also stand for "Not On Normal Courtyard Exercise" (meaning prisoners intended to keep separate from the rest). Either way, it featured prominently in the fine "Brasseye" spoof TV news programme where popular celebrities were duped into wearing T-shirts advocating "nonce-sense".

 

phut adj pron. "fuht" gone- Something which has breathed its last, expired. It is an ex-something: we ended up stuck watching BBC2 because the television remote control had gone phut.

 

rat-arsed adj exceedingly drunk. Also abbreviated as simply "ratted". Possibly derived from a time when dead rats would be dangled in cider vats to give them extra flavour. At least, according to the person who told me that.

 

schtum adj pron. "shtoom" silent. Only really used in the context "keep schtum", meaning "keep your mouth shut" in the UK. It is derived from the German adjective "stumm", meaning being either unable or unwilling to speak.

 

That IS a rather amusing site. The author has a good sense of humor.

 

railway n railroad. Can't think of anything witty.

 

baps

 

WAY 2 many choices

I'm gonna have to go with the last one listed
zimmer

 

Zimmer n also "Zimmer frame" walker. One of those four-legged frame devices that the elderly use in order to help them get around the place. Zimmer is the brand name of a manufacturer of these things.