A truck driving lesbo named Spike
hauled dildos by night down the turnpike.
When asked by the fuzz
what it is that she does,
she replied "I'm a fake dick van dike."

 

But does she have herpes?

 

 

No good?

 

:lime:

 

There once was a man named Skinner
who took a young lady to dinner.
They sat down to dine
at quarter past nine
and by quarter past ten it was in her
(the dinner, not Skinner,
Skinner was in her before dinner).

 

If the skirts got any shorter"
said the typist with a blush...
"There'd be two more lips to powder
and lots more hair to brush... !"
(Bob Hope)

 

When a corpulent spinster named Snow
Was approached by a dwarf for a blow,
She replied, "I have pride!
Your request is denied!
I could never, sir, stoop quite that low!"

 

Old Charlie, a jolly old bloke,
Made love to a cow as a joke.
He found pleasure divine
With this friendly bovine.
Now they call him the old cowpoke!

 

The new cinematic emporium
is not just a supersensorium
but a highly effectual
heterosexual
mutual masterbatorium.