The Semi-official random whore quotes!
way...Dick 
Registered User
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 12,891
Likes: 0
From: Port-au-Prince, Haiti
HamSatan: hello Mr. Paine
HamSatan: this is tim from the IRS
HamSatan: thank you for paying your back taxes...we really appreciate it
HamSatan: the phone threats to your home have been lifted
mikepaine: BACK taxes?
HamSatan: have a nice day
mikepaine: like IDB?
mikepaine: your taxing that now?
mikepaine: WTF???
HamSatan: we tax everything
mikepaine: sheesh!
mikepaine: isnt their some kinda freak exemption?
HamSatan: after all....ALL things fun are truly the product of this great land of ours
HamSatan: sadly no
mikepaine: IDB should be "public domain"
HamSatan: we are instating a condom tax
HamSatan: a personal lubricant tax (it's a petroleum product)
HamSatan: and a pleather tax
mikepaine: huh
HamSatan: fake vynl-like leather is also an oil-based product
mikepaine: so whipped cream and nipple torture kits are still NON-taxable?
HamSatan: we're trying to limit people's consumption
HamSatan: currently on the boards in the House is the "Victoria's Secret tax"
mikepaine: interesting
HamSatan: whipped creme has sales tax.....we try not to tax twice whenever possible
mikepaine: double taxation!
HamSatan: though your local or municipal government can exercise their own laws in such matters
HamSatan: nono
HamSatan: just sales tax on whipped creme
mikepaine: NOT TRUE
mikepaine: LIES you tell me
HamSatan: I'm the IRS
HamSatan: I lie to my mother
HamSatan: and I'll step on her for the right price
mikepaine: I bough t a fabulous new double ended dildo just last week and they tried to tax me on both ends!
mikepaine: WTF
HamSatan: 5 cnets per head
mikepaine: hence double taxation!
HamSatan: think of it like a "per axle" toll
mikepaine: not fair
HamSatan: eh...
HamSatan: I don't care....I'm the IRS
HamSatan: lol
mikepaine: its a butt tax instead of a head tax in other wards?
HamSatan: I'm sorry...I'm not at liberty to say unless it costs you money
mikepaine: example A: I line up a nice whore for wanton (NOT WANTONE) hot sex! you dont tax me
HamSatan: if you paid the whore...we tax her income
mikepaine: Example B: I line up same said whore for IDB...taxed or no tax?
HamSatan: if you paid the whore....we tax her income
HamSatan: we will also tax you for any equipment purchased
mikepaine: and my own equipment???
HamSatan: yes.
HamSatan: gerbils are also taxed ;-)
mikepaine: I HAVE THE EQUIPMENT ALREADY!!!
HamSatan: it's okay the equipment tax goes to support healthcare
mikepaine: and I gave generously to the Moyle at the begining of the equipment's life!
mikepaine: YOU AINT TAKING ANY MORE!!!!
HamSatan: non-applicable
mikepaine: : protest:
HamSatan: move to Canada
HamSatan: lol
mikepaine: ROFL
HamSatan: I'm quoting this whole damn thing
mikepaine: LOL
mikepaine: make it public!
mikepaine: you MUST be the IRS
HamSatan: you bet......it's always the one you least suspect
HamSatan: this is tim from the IRS
HamSatan: thank you for paying your back taxes...we really appreciate it
HamSatan: the phone threats to your home have been lifted
mikepaine: BACK taxes?
HamSatan: have a nice day
mikepaine: like IDB?
mikepaine: your taxing that now?
mikepaine: WTF???
HamSatan: we tax everything
mikepaine: sheesh!
mikepaine: isnt their some kinda freak exemption?
HamSatan: after all....ALL things fun are truly the product of this great land of ours
HamSatan: sadly no
mikepaine: IDB should be "public domain"
HamSatan: we are instating a condom tax
HamSatan: a personal lubricant tax (it's a petroleum product)
HamSatan: and a pleather tax
mikepaine: huh
HamSatan: fake vynl-like leather is also an oil-based product
mikepaine: so whipped cream and nipple torture kits are still NON-taxable?
HamSatan: we're trying to limit people's consumption
HamSatan: currently on the boards in the House is the "Victoria's Secret tax"
mikepaine: interesting
HamSatan: whipped creme has sales tax.....we try not to tax twice whenever possible
mikepaine: double taxation!
HamSatan: though your local or municipal government can exercise their own laws in such matters
HamSatan: nono
HamSatan: just sales tax on whipped creme
mikepaine: NOT TRUE
mikepaine: LIES you tell me
HamSatan: I'm the IRS
HamSatan: I lie to my mother
HamSatan: and I'll step on her for the right price
mikepaine: I bough t a fabulous new double ended dildo just last week and they tried to tax me on both ends!
mikepaine: WTF
HamSatan: 5 cnets per head
mikepaine: hence double taxation!
HamSatan: think of it like a "per axle" toll
mikepaine: not fair
HamSatan: eh...
HamSatan: I don't care....I'm the IRS
HamSatan: lol
mikepaine: its a butt tax instead of a head tax in other wards?
HamSatan: I'm sorry...I'm not at liberty to say unless it costs you money
mikepaine: example A: I line up a nice whore for wanton (NOT WANTONE) hot sex! you dont tax me
HamSatan: if you paid the whore...we tax her income
mikepaine: Example B: I line up same said whore for IDB...taxed or no tax?
HamSatan: if you paid the whore....we tax her income
HamSatan: we will also tax you for any equipment purchased
mikepaine: and my own equipment???
HamSatan: yes.
HamSatan: gerbils are also taxed ;-)
mikepaine: I HAVE THE EQUIPMENT ALREADY!!!
HamSatan: it's okay the equipment tax goes to support healthcare
mikepaine: and I gave generously to the Moyle at the begining of the equipment's life!
mikepaine: YOU AINT TAKING ANY MORE!!!!
HamSatan: non-applicable
mikepaine: : protest:
HamSatan: move to Canada
HamSatan: lol
mikepaine: ROFL
HamSatan: I'm quoting this whole damn thing
mikepaine: LOL
mikepaine: make it public!
mikepaine: you MUST be the IRS
HamSatan: you bet......it's always the one you least suspect
