A drunk walks out of a bar with a key in his hand and he is stumbling back and forth.
A cop on the beat sees him and approaches and says" can I help you sir?"
"Yessshhhh ssssomebody ssstole my carrrr" the man replies.
The cop asks "were was your car the last time you saw it"?
The man replies"at the end of thissshhh key"
The cop looks down and notices the man's weiner is hanging out of his fly for all the world to see.
He asks the man "sir are you aware that you are exposing yourself?
Momentarilyconfused, the drunk looks down at his crotch and without miising a beat blurts out
"SON OF A BITCH THEY GOT MY GIRLFRIEND TOO'!

 

.....ha

 

A little old man shuffled into an ice cream parlor pulled himself slowly and painfully up on a stool.
After catching his breath he ordered a banana split.
The waitress asked kindly"crushed nuts?"
"No" he replied "arthriris".

 

he he he

 

heheh

 

A guy goes to his doctor for a checkup and during the rectal exam the doctor starts laughing. "Sorry but you've got the biggest butthole I've ever seen!" The guy says "well I was in Africa and well...,I was raped by an elephant".
The doctor says "I know for a fact, despite popular opinion,
elephants have rather small penises."
"Yeah" says the guy,"but he fingered me first".

 

Ouch hahaha

 

 

 

I agree with Zoe !!!!!