Why Motorcars are better than women

Your Motorcar doesn't get upset when you forget it's birthday.
You don't have to talk to your Motorcar after you drive it.
You can choke your Motorcar.
Your Motorcar doesn't get mad when you ignore it for a month or so.
Motorcars don't get jealous if you come home with grease under your fingernails.
Motorcars don't snore.
Your Motorcar won't wake you up at 3:00 AM and ask you if you love it.
Your Motorcar won't leave you for another driver.
You don't have to pay child or income support to an ex-Motorcar.
If you say bad things to your Motorcar, you don't have to apologise before you can drive it again.
If your Motorcar doesn't look good, you can paint it or get better parts.
If your Motorcar goes flat, you can fix it.
If your Motorcar is mis-aligned, you don't have to discuss politics to correct it.
If your Motorcar is too loose, you can tighten it.
If your Motorcar is too soft, you can get different shock-absorbers.
If your Motorcar makes too much noise, you can buy a silencer.
If your Motorcar smokes, you can do something about it.
It's always OK to use tie downs on your Motorcar.
Motorcars always feel like going for a ride.
Motorcars don't care about how many other Motorcars you have driven.
Motorcars don't care about how many other Motorcars you have.
Motorcars don't care if you are late.
Motorcars don't get pregnant.
Motorcars don't have parents.
Motorcars don't insult you if you are a bad driver.
Motorcars don't mind if you look at other Motorcars, or if you buy Motorcar magazines.
Motorcars don't whine unless something is really wrong.
Motorcars last longer.
Motorcars only need their fluids changed every 2,000 miles.
Motorcars' curves never sag.
New Motorcars must be asked for, and if you don't want to pay for them, you don't get them.
You and your Motorcar both arrive at the same time.
You can have any colour Motorcar and show it to your parents.
You can kick your Motorcar to wake it up.
You can drive a Motorcar as long as you want and it won't get sore.
You can drive a Motorcar any time of the month.
You can share your Motorcycle with your friends.
You can't get diseases from a Motorcar you don't know very well.
You don't have to be jealous of the guy that works on your Motorcar.
You don't have to convince your Motorcar that you're a motorcyclist and that you think that Motorcars are equals.
You don't have to deal with priests to register your Motorcar.
You don't have to take a shower before driving your Motorcar.
You only need to get a new chain or belt for your Motorcar when the old one is REALLY worn.
Your Motorcar never wants a night out alone with the other Motorcars.
Your parents don't remain in touch with your old Motorcar after you dump it.
Your Motorcar doesn't care what you're wearing when you take it out.
Wearing four fresh rubbers makes a ride in a Motorcar more enjoyable.
The rashes you get from Motorcars go away without those painful Penicillin shots.
One gets in no trouble for storing disassembled pieces of the Motorcar in the basement.
Disassembling the Motorcar is done out of pleasure rather than need.
Motorcars always sound pleasant.
Unlike women fat Motorcars aren't cheap dates.

 

Haha, I was like ... wow, something major must have happened.

 

 

Like you'd show up anyways

 

I'd say happens.. but that's whatever.

 

Buttplugs aren't considered 'tools' Pete.

 

... and easier for you to buy. Since I don't believe prostitution is legal in your state.

 

Hahaha - I love that movie!

 

... so you're saying she goes for the cheap guys?!?

 

That's cause she doesn't tell you... she doesn't have to. You openly invite.