1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down
your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.

2. Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to
hold while you chop.

3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about leaving the toilet seat up by using
the sink.

4. High blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few
minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your
alarm clock, will prevent you from
rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you'll be
afraid to cough.

7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move
and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and it does, use the Duct
Tape.

Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

Daily thought: Some people are like slinkies, not really good for anything
but they bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.

And remember... if you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.


fltsfshr

 

That was easy.

I feel better now.

 

 

#5 is my favorite.

 

hehe those are pretty good, I like the slinky analogy.....

 

 

 

Especially on those TDY's where you have way to much to and have to get up to make your flight.


Not that I know this from expierence.

 

That made my day a lot better, thanks for posting!