A guy was out of town on business. The morning after the night he arrived, he was in the bathroom of his hotel room shaving. He looked at himself in the mirror and thought "God, I need a haircut. I wonder if I can take care of that before my big meeting this morning. He asked the hotel concierge if there was a barber on the premises. The concierge replied "Walk down that arcade and you'll find an automatic haircut machine." He thought "Automatic haircut machine, I wonder how that works?" He walked down the arcade and came upon a refrigerator sized machine with a shoulder height, head-sized hole in front and a sign that read "Automatic haircut: $10." He deposited $10 and put his head in the hole. A mechanical arm with clippers cut his hair. Then a jet of warm air blew away the loose hair. Then another mechanical arm with a comb combed his hair. He pulled his head out and a little mirror popped out from the top. The best haircut he'd had in his life! He continued down the arcade and came upon another machine with a hole at the bottom and a sign that read "Automatic shoe shine: $3. He deposited $3 and put his shoes in the hole. A mechanical arm with a pad applied polish. Then high speed buffer brushes polished his shoes. He pulled his shoes out. The best shoe shine he'd ever had in his life! He continued down the arcade and came upon another machine with a smaller, waist-sized hole and a sign that red "What every man needs when he is away from his wife or significant other: $20" He thought "Now this is getting interesting!" He looked around, saw no one, unzipped his pants, pulled his pecker out, deposited $20, and put his pecker in the hole. Then he let out a bloodcurdling scream. 15 seconds later the machine released his pecker..........Scroll down.





































.....with a button sewn on it!

 

 

that gives me virtual pain just thinking about it. like when you see someone get hit in the nuts with a baseball or something.

 

i was predicting the punchline but i was thinking it'd be more amusing than a button machine...

 

I thought it was gonna get lopped off.

 

I can definitely tell it wasn't a cut and paste...

 

Raptor didnt Raptor this one

 

 

me too...