Off-topic Talk Where overpaid, underworked S2000 owners waste the worst part of their days before the drive home. This forum is for general chit chat and discussions not covered by the other off-topic forums.

foreplay... what don't I understand???

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Old Dec 12, 2001 | 06:57 PM
  #1  
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From: Fraser
Default foreplay... what don't I understand???

Lately the wife tells me I'm only in it for the big finish - not enough attention to details.

So I come home from work early. Pour her a glass of wine. Rub her shoulders, ask if she wants to hot tub. Afterwards, I cook her a wonderful dinner...

An hour later I'm paying SOOOO much attention I should get an award. Hitting every spot, every inch with loving tenderness. Every crack, every crevice, every curve - nothing escapes my undivided affection. My hands and fingers feeling, probing areas I can't even see. All sorts of lotions - exotic ingredients I can hardly pronounce! And finally, when we are finished, I gently put the covers over her for the long night.

Then I crack a beer, scratch my crotch, and wonder what time my wife will get home from being out with the girls...

She really should have seen how great the 2000 looks before I covered it for the winter... oh well
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Old Dec 12, 2001 | 06:59 PM
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LOL Nice, I think you forget to mention what LOTION you have used on her..!! a Zaino?
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Old Dec 12, 2001 | 07:02 PM
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From: FCUK
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LOL good one
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Old Dec 12, 2001 | 07:09 PM
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From: Fraser
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No Zaino - haven't had the time or inclination to order yet - mostly Meguier's products - and lots of elbow grease. Car looks awesome. Zaino seems like the popular choice - although a bit complex...

Love the smell of the tire stuff - although it has silicone in it? Is that bad?
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Old Dec 12, 2001 | 08:12 PM
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LOL!
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Old Dec 12, 2001 | 08:38 PM
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LOL

as long as your not sleeping in the garage
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Old Dec 12, 2001 | 10:44 PM
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From: stafford
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LOL
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Old Dec 13, 2001 | 02:58 AM
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From: Atlanta
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.........Excellent!!!

My wife has whined many times in the last five weeks " You love that damn car more than you love me"


And her point
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Old Dec 13, 2001 | 03:57 AM
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From: West Mids.
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LOL... Well I read through your post, thinking '$hit what IS he doing wrong,?.... this guy is a love god!!!'

Funny post.
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Old Dec 13, 2001 | 06:26 AM
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You need a vibrator.
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