I've seen this topic come up here before, but every person is in a unique situations, and the same blanket answers may not apply to everyone. Here's my story. I relocated from Wisconsin to Texas a little over a year ago. It's not so much that I don't have friends, I just wish that I had more friends, and I'm not sure what's the best way to go about it. I've met some really cool people at church (I was raised religious, but honestly, I go for the social aspect of it more then the spiritual part). There are maybe a half a dozen guys from work that I'm cool with and hang out with every once in a while. My other group of friends lives about 2.5 hours from Houston, but I knew them before I even moved here.

By far the majority of the people I hang out with are guys. My friends that live out in the country have a lot of fun, they do things that every guy would like to do, such as wrecking cars (one guy owns a junk yard), 4-wheeling, flying, wake boarding, etc. Problem is they're all a few years older then me, married so there are absolutely no women in that group, the women do their own thing.

Out of the group the group that I met through my church, I only have maybe a 2 or 3 good friends that I see regularly, the rest are just acquaintances. No single women that I'm interested in. My group of friends from work usually just go to the bars or clubs, not really my things, so I don't hang out with them that often.

What I'd like to do is meet new people that I can hang out with, and hopefully gain some female friends. Not really looking for someone to be messing around with right away, I'd be more interested in becoming friends, and then ****** her friends later on. Here's the catch: I don't drink (hate bars and clubs), don't smoke, don't do drugs and don't even eat meat (far from a hippie though). Can anyone give me some good ideas on how to go about meeting new people?

 

My advice is to pick the most social of the dudes you know and get along with, and the two of you go join a local sports league. Keep in mind which co-ed sports girls are most likely to play and enjoy. Volleyball, particularly beach volleyball has great girl attraction qualities.

I made a bunch of new friends, including a couple very cute chicks through that myself.

Then the other dudes and already-in-a-relationship girls also became friends and I met more girls through them after they take you on as a little project for themselves to find a match for with their other girl friends. Stay off the dating sites unless you're just trying to get your dinky stinky.

 

look for an activity club, or go to church singles nights, or look for mixers

 

I'd also recommend getting really really high and picking up chicks at the deli, then take them out for drinks...doh.

 

Take a class or some classes at a community college for a subject you're interested in. Great example: Beginning guitar, or French 101. If you want to meet girls, take a beginners sewing or dancing class (ballroom, swing, salsa).

Do some volunteer work at a local shelter or soup kitchen or something like that, particularly one with a regular schedule where you can see the same people repeatedly. If you want to meet girls, volunteer to work with kids.

Seek out the most social person (as far as you can tell) at your church, and become friends with them. That should get you invites to a few group events until you give them a reason not to invite you anymore. If you want to meet girls, then go talk to them. Rumor has it there are more single Christian girls than guys.

Go on an online dating site and limit your matches to people in close proximity. Look for people you may not be attracted to, but you think would be fun, and play the "new in town" card. Be honest, and become friends. If you want to meet girls, be nice and maybe they'll introduce you to their friends.

 

start drinking and going to bars


i've actually moved twice since college so i have experience, but there wasn't any magic bullet for me. I met people through work mostly, then met their friends, and continued out from there

 

I've tried this. I've gone out with maybe 4 or 5 girls that I met online. In the end none of them worked out. One of them ended up being fat in person even though she looked normal size in her pictures. There was one that I would have been interested in, but apparently she was dating other people at the same time and found someone she liked more then me.

 

When you say activity club, do you mean one like Events and Adventures? I looked into it, but it seemed to be someone trying to make money (they charge something like $1600/year to join) rather then a true club where you meet people.

What do you mean by mixers?

 

Find one of these, and there's a woman not too far away.

 

Think about any hobbies or activities that you've always wanted to try or that look interesting to you. You can probably find a group that meets locally (either through your city or online) and try it out. People tend to build better bonds and relationships as they move forward with the things they want to do.

Also, develop some "mainstream" interests, whether simply by reading, watching, or actually doing. Keep these in your back pocket for conversation and networking.

And always keep up with your passions.

But you said it, there is no blanket answer. It sounds like you've got your things in order, but you've got groups of friends that don't intertwine with each other. Think about the ones you are closest with from the different groups, and find a way to slowly start closing that gap and bringing it together. This won't always work, but it is a good thing when your friends become friends with each other. HTH