Off-topic Talk Where overpaid, underworked S2000 owners waste the worst part of their days before the drive home. This forum is for general chit chat and discussions not covered by the other off-topic forums.

The lady can golf.

Thread Tools
 
Old Sep 23, 2009 | 09:54 AM
  #1  
The Raptor's Avatar
Thread Starter
Gold Member (Premium)
20 Year Member
Community Builder
Active Streak: 30 Days
Liked
 
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 59,364
Likes: 1,614
From: La Crescenta, CA
Default The lady can golf.

A group of male lawyers lived and died for their Saturday morning round of golf. One transferred to another city. It wasn't the same without him. A new woman lawyer joined their law firm. She overheard the guys talking about their golf round. She said, "You know, I used to play on my golf team in college and I was pretty good. Would you mind if I joined you next week?" The three guys looked at each other Not one of them wanted to say "yes," but she had them on the spot. Finally, one man said it would be okay, but they would be starting early -- at 6:30 am. He figured the early tee-time would discourage her. The woman said this may bbe a problem, and asked if she could be up to 15 minutes late. They rolled their eyes, but said okay. She smiled and said, "Good, I'll be there at 6:30 or 6:45." She showed up at 6:30 sharp, and beat all three of them with an eye-opening 2-under par round. She was fun and pleasant person, and the guys were impressed. Back at the clubhouse, they congratulated her and invited her back the next week. She smiled, and said, "I'll be there at 6:30 or 6:45." The next week she again showed up at 6:30 sharp. Only this time, she played left-handed. The three lawyers were incredulous as she still beat them with an even par round, despite playing with her off-hand. They were totally amazed, but wondered if she was trying to make them look bad by beating them left-handed. They couldn't figure her out. She was again very pleasant and didn't seem to be purposely showing them up. They invited her back again, but each man harbored a burning desire to beat her game. The third week, the guys had their game faces on. But this time, she was 15 minutes late, which made the guys irritable. This week the lady lawyer played right-handed, and narrowly beat all three of them. The men mused that her late arrival was due to petty gamesmanship on her part. However, she was so gracious and so complimentary of their strong play, they couldn't hold a grudge. Back in the clubhouse, all three guys were shaking their heads. This woman was a riddle no one could figure out. They had a couple of beers and, finally, one of the men asked her point blank "How do you decide if you're going to golf right-handed or left-handed?" The lady blushed, and grinned. "That's easy," she said. "When my dad taught me to play golf, I learned I was ambidextrous. I like to switch back and forth. When I got married in college, I discovered my husband always sleeps in the nude. From then on, I developed a silly habit. Right before I left in the morning for golf practice, I would pull the covers off him. If his you-know-what was pointing to the right, I golfed right-handed; if it was pointed to the left, I golfed left-handed." The guys on the team thought this was hysterical. Astonished at this bizarre information, one of the guys shot back "But what if it's pointing straight up in the air?" She said "Then, I'm fifteen minutes late."
Reply
Old Sep 23, 2009 | 09:58 AM
  #2  
Stage1's Avatar
Registered User
 
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 6,773
Likes: 0
Default

Reply
Old Sep 23, 2009 | 10:05 AM
  #3  
NNY S2k's Avatar
20 Year Member
Liked
Loved
Community Favorite
 
Joined: Mar 2002
Posts: 25,640
Likes: 407
From: Plattsburgh, NY
Default

Good one.
Reply
Old Sep 23, 2009 | 10:14 AM
  #4  
Quikie's Avatar
Registered User
 
Joined: Mar 2009
Posts: 5,866
Likes: 0
From: St. Louis, Mo
Default

Reply
Old Sep 23, 2009 | 10:19 AM
  #5  
DFWs2k's Avatar
Registered User
 
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 14,614
Likes: 2
From: Denton, TX
Default

nice
Reply
Old Sep 23, 2009 | 10:27 AM
  #6  
mxt_77's Avatar
Registered User
 
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 8,482
Likes: 3
From: Wylie, TX
Default

yukyukyuk.
Reply
Old Sep 23, 2009 | 10:32 AM
  #7  
Bobert's Avatar
Registered User
 
Joined: Feb 2008
Posts: 736
Likes: 0
From: Round Town, IL
Default

Entirely too long
Reply
Old Sep 23, 2009 | 10:33 AM
  #8  
thebig33tuna's Avatar
 
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 32,283
Likes: 0
From: Cincinnati, OH
Default

^


oldie but goodie
Reply
Old Sep 24, 2009 | 06:22 AM
  #9  
AlX Boi's Avatar
 
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 4,605
Likes: 4
From: Irvine, California
Default

We might need a thread dedicated with compilations of links to Raptor's jokes. It'll definitely lighten up any crappy mood.
Reply
Old Sep 24, 2009 | 10:11 AM
  #10  
broilmebk's Avatar
Registered User
 
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,290
Likes: 0
From: Orange County
Default

lol. quite a long read but worth it
Reply



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 04:50 PM.