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The MAN Thread

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Old Sep 21, 2004 | 11:35 AM
  #1  
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Default The MAN Thread

Why men are happier...

Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO T-shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental -- $100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood -- all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
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Old Sep 21, 2004 | 02:58 PM
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Old Sep 21, 2004 | 03:32 PM
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*Most* women can have sex whenever they want.


They win.

LoL. J/K.
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Old Sep 21, 2004 | 04:15 PM
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men can rub one out in <5 minutes! WE WIN!
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Old Sep 21, 2004 | 04:20 PM
  #5  
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This is too much
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Old Sep 21, 2004 | 07:39 PM
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Originally Posted by r_duff,Sep 21 2004, 04:15 PM
men can rub one out in <5 minutes! WE WIN!
Women can rub one out in public (ie. in the back of a crowded bus), and nobody is the wiser.
They still don't win though

"The world is our urinal!"
I'm still chuckling about this one
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Old Sep 21, 2004 | 11:22 PM
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Funny stuff.
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Old Sep 22, 2004 | 04:51 AM
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i just farted.
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Old Sep 22, 2004 | 05:22 AM
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me too.
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Old Sep 22, 2004 | 06:25 AM
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How about....

"Never have to pass anything the size of a watermelon out of any orafice"
"Two words.....No Tampax"

or

"No one will ever have dinner from my nipples"



May the Force be With You.
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