Some of you have probably heard some of these, but it is said that these statements were actually entered into peoples medical records.

Although the patient did not have chills at examination, her husband reported she was very hot in bed last night.

The patient refused an autopsy.

The patient has no history of previous suicides.

The patient has been depressed since I began seeing her in 1993.

The patient was constantly crying and tearful. She also seemed depressed.

The patient has numbness from the toes down.

I saw your patient today, and he is still under our car for physical therapy.

The genitalia was examined and he was found to be circus sized.

The pelvic region will be examined later on the floor.

The patient had a large brown stool ambulating down the hallway.

The patient has 2 teenage children but no other medical abnormalities.

The patient has had no significant medical changes but did gain 40 lbs. in the last 3 days.

Thats all I can remember now. Some of these make me laugh and I hope they make you laugh too.

Cya

 

umm i get some of them

the 1st one is the best one

 

"The genitalia was examined and found to be circus sized"

 

sounds like medical students writings

 

"The pelvic region will be examined later on the floor. "

That's the best one

 

at the risk of being booed, here are a few more

While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.

The lab test indicates abnormal lover function.

She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got the divorce.

Both breast were equal and responsive to light.

The patient was scheduled for bowel surgery but took a job as a stockbroker instead.

The patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia at lunch.



THE END






or is it?

 

Anorexia is the medical term for loss of appetite, so there isn't anything goofy about that

 

Well if the term "depressed" is being used to mean as in a more chronic condition as opposed to having the temporary blues, then that makes sense.

 

I checked it out...

I learn something new everyday.

 

Yeah, but in this sentence, it seems like she ATE anorexia for lunch. Many of these arn't goofy, it just sounds funny.