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New FDA Warning Labels On Alcohol...

Old Jan 12, 2004 | 02:53 PM
  #1  
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Default New FDA Warning Labels On Alcohol...



#9 really hits hom
THE TOP 13 ADDITIONAL WARNINGS THE FDA IS CONSIDERING FOR BEER AND ALCOHOL BOTTLES

13. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

12. WARNING: consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an asshole.

11. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.

10. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.

9. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning.

8. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants.

7. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name you can't remember).

6. WARNING: consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.

5. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really, really big guy named Bubba.

4. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.

3. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.

2. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear".

1. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy.
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Old Jan 12, 2004 | 03:11 PM
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I can add several to that list, when the hang over passes :
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Old Jan 12, 2004 | 04:06 PM
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3. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.

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Old Jan 12, 2004 | 04:55 PM
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yep:
thats one of them!
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