Here I am asking relationship advise on a car site, go figure. Anyway, my gf for 3yrs, who is mormon, moved to Utah last Monday to go to school and "be more acquanted with the mormon lifestyle." She claims that she will be back in 4 months if things are good between us, but she also wants me to learn and attend the mormon church before she comes home(which I really dont have a problem with). Shes a great person and I do love her, my question is what would you all do in my shoes? Im just trying to get a feel for what most people would do. BTW our families are totally different regarding lifestyle and religion.

Greg

 

Marry another girl while she's gone, when she gets back tell her you've learned a lot about being a mormon and that you'd like her to be your second wife.

 

Allright, here's my 2 cents:

Be yourself. Do not change for anyone or anything, because then you will no longer be who you are. You are the person she fell in love with, right? Well then, if she is asking you to change, then it is blatently obvious that she is no longer in love with you, but rather she is in love with the idea of you.

I was married for five years to a woman whom I changed for - unfortunately I lost who I was, and she ended up moving on to someone more like me than me - if you understand what I mean.

I'm not talking about little changes here either - and neither are you. Religion is a huge part of one's life - it defines many of your moral standards, and whether we admit it or not, it also affects our perspective.

Two questions -
what does she mean, 'Things are good between us?'
and, have you thouroughly investigates the Mormon Church and their beliefs? Do those beliefs align with your own?

just my 2 cents.

 

Now that was funny.

 

Marry another girl while she's gone, when she gets back tell her you've learned a lot about being a mormon and that you'd like her to be your second wife.

Thats hilarious!

By saying "things are good between us" she means me becoming mormon I guess, lets face it, thats the only way she will be with me seems like. Keep the replies coming.

Greg

 

I wouldn't change or adopt a religion simply because someone else wanted me to.

 

I have absolutely refused to attend church or alter my religious beliefs because of anyone in the past and I will stick to that for the rest of my life. I really don't care whether my girl is religious or not, and if so which one, but I do not tolerate anyone pushing religion on me. Either she loves you for you or she doesn't.

 

Usually, I would have some really smartassed funny comment to a question like this(like tie her up with a drop cord and put her in the closet for a while. She'll forget all about being a Mormon). But, I don't.

This seems to be a kind of intersection in your life. Go straight and become Mormon (while presumably leaving your faith and beliefs behind) and marrying the girl. Or, staying true to yourself and your beliefs and losing the girl.

This is as tough as it gets. Only speaking for myself, (as a Baptist) I could never renounce my faith and beliefs for any reason. Without getting too much into religion, it is my faith in God that gets me through life and all the hard times and good times and twists and turns that come with it.

My advice to you is this. If religion is not that big of a factor and you don't mind pretending to be Mormon (or maybe this is your calling), do it and keep the girl. The pitfall with this is , if you're pretending, she'll eventually find out and that will be that. Even if she doesn't, your life may be un-rewarding religiously.

If your beliefs are not compatible with the Mormons, and you don't want to live a lie, break it off. The pitfall here is you lose the girl.

Relationships between differing religions is the hardest thing to get past. Choose wisely young grasshopper as this decision will surely affect the rest of your life. Divorce is expensive.

BTW, do you know why divorce is so expensive?


Cuz its worth it.

 

your own personal beliefs are more important than any girl.

 

Has she said that you need to be mormon?


I have a Jewish uncle and irish catholic aunt....theyve gotten along wonderfully for over 30 years, raising several kids that they let decide what religion to persue.


It can work if you guys let it......however if she demands that you be mormon or demands that you act a certain way about nearly anything then I would say it doesnt look too good.