Off-topic Talk Where overpaid, underworked S2000 owners waste the worst part of their days before the drive home. This forum is for general chit chat and discussions not covered by the other off-topic forums.

somethinG tO pondeR

Old Sep 17, 2002 | 02:58 PM
  #1  
krazik's Avatar
Thread Starter
Administrator
25 Year Member
Liked
Loved
 
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 17,004
Likes: 7
From: Santa Cruz, CA, US
Default somethinG tO pondeR

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out"?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

What do you call male ballerinas?

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??

Why ARE Trix only for kids?

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

Why is a person that handles your money called a 'Broker'?

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

If a man is talking in the forest, and no woman is there to hear him, is he still wrong?

Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Is Disney World the only people-trap operated by a mouse?

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ass?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window.
Reply
Old Sep 17, 2002 | 03:01 PM
  #2  
The Unabageler's Avatar
Former Moderator
 
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 20,448
Likes: 0
From: internet
Default

hehe nice list
Reply
Old Sep 17, 2002 | 03:02 PM
  #3  
nexus's Avatar
Gold Member (Premium)
 
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 1,225
Likes: 0
From: Santa Cruz
Default

sickness of the mind abounds
Reply
Old Sep 17, 2002 | 04:36 PM
  #4  
tokyo_james's Avatar
Registered User
 
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 65,827
Likes: 2
From: FCUK
Default

Sickness of the mind isn't always a bad thing
Reply
Old Sep 17, 2002 | 05:58 PM
  #5  
PB02's Avatar
Registered User
 
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 4,667
Likes: 0
From: Melbourne
Default

Originally posted by krazik

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?


I believe I know someone that does.



Looks the direction of James.
Reply
Old Sep 17, 2002 | 06:00 PM
  #6  
tokyo_james's Avatar
Registered User
 
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 65,827
Likes: 2
From: FCUK
Default

:looks in the direction of Peter wondering why he forgot the "::" in his post :
Reply
Old Sep 17, 2002 | 06:03 PM
  #7  
PB02's Avatar
Registered User
 
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 4,667
Likes: 0
From: Melbourne
Default

:hangs head in shame:



:wonders what I was thinking:




:realizes the answer is nothing:
Reply
Old Sep 17, 2002 | 06:45 PM
  #8  
tokyo_james's Avatar
Registered User
 
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 65,827
Likes: 2
From: FCUK
Default

: laughs out loud to himself :

: rolls his eyes that he didn't use basic vb for the last thought :
Reply
Old Sep 17, 2002 | 07:03 PM
  #9  
PB02's Avatar
Registered User
 
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 4,667
Likes: 0
From: Melbourne
Default

:hangs head even lower in shame:




:suffers from neck cramp:
Reply
Old Sep 17, 2002 | 07:13 PM
  #10  
tokyo_james's Avatar
Registered User
 
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 65,827
Likes: 2
From: FCUK
Default

: punches Peter in the neck while he isn't concentrating:

:runs into the mysterious mist whooping and hollering:

:runs straight into Red who is chasing him from another thread :
Reply


All times are GMT -8. The time now is 11:14 AM.