Tennis elbow joke
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Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 59,370
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From: La Crescenta, CA
Tennis elbow joke
A guy had a terrible, painful case of tennis elbow. It throbbed with pain as he happened to drive his S2K past his doctor's office, so he stopped and dropped in unannounced. The receptionist/nurse said "I'm sorry, the doctor isn't here right now, but, if you like, you can try our new, state-of-the-art diagnostic machine. He agreed, she handed him a cup, and told him to go in the bathroom and produce a urine specimen. He did and she poured it in the top of what looked like an oversized blender. Flashing lights, whirring sounds, and out prints a ticker tape message. The nurse tears it off and reads it:"Yep, you have tennis elbow, otherwise known as Bicepetel Tendonitis. Ice it 20 minutes on, 20 minutes off, 20 minutes on, 20 minutes off, 20 minutes on. Wait one hour and repeat every day. Otherwise keep it wrapped in an Ace bandage and no tennis or heavy lifting for three weeks.
Four day later he gets a bill for $400 and he hits the roof. He calls the doctor's office and raises holy hell. The receptionist replies "Sir, I told you it is state-of-the-art. We have to charge that much to pay for it. I'll tell you what, come back in and we'll give you a free retest. He agrees.
He'll show them. He prepares his own urine specimen in advance. He gets a big jar and pisses in it. His wife, son, daughter, and dog all piss in it. He drains a little oil out of his car's crankcase into it. He whacks off and comes into it.
He goes back to the doctor's office and hands the jar to the nurse, who pours it into the diagnostic machine. Flashing lights, whirring sounds, and a long ticker tape message. The nurse tears it off and reads it: "It says here your wife's pregnant, your daughter's got Herpes, your son's got AIDS, your dog's got fleas, your car's about to blow up, you've still got tennis elbow, and if you don't quit beating off you're going to go blind."
Four day later he gets a bill for $400 and he hits the roof. He calls the doctor's office and raises holy hell. The receptionist replies "Sir, I told you it is state-of-the-art. We have to charge that much to pay for it. I'll tell you what, come back in and we'll give you a free retest. He agrees.
He'll show them. He prepares his own urine specimen in advance. He gets a big jar and pisses in it. His wife, son, daughter, and dog all piss in it. He drains a little oil out of his car's crankcase into it. He whacks off and comes into it.
He goes back to the doctor's office and hands the jar to the nurse, who pours it into the diagnostic machine. Flashing lights, whirring sounds, and a long ticker tape message. The nurse tears it off and reads it: "It says here your wife's pregnant, your daughter's got Herpes, your son's got AIDS, your dog's got fleas, your car's about to blow up, you've still got tennis elbow, and if you don't quit beating off you're going to go blind."
