today is the worst day of my life (the funniest also)
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Joined: Aug 2002
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From: winnipeg
today is the worst day of my life (the funniest also)
ok heres the deal, woke up at around 7am, dressed up and hopped into my 87 prelude. its a nice day so i decided to bask in the sun, so i was cruising along then i farted.. dam it was a wet, unexpected fart the kind that u check twice in case theres some crap that fell out.. but i couldnt check because i was driving.. twenty minutes later i felt a huge feeling that i have to take a crap... i had to find a restroom ASAP! when i saw a mcdonald's nearby i got all excited because i know i can take a shit there, ok... do you ever get that feeling that when you have to take a shit, the more excited you get, the more it wants to come out faster? well i do, anyways i was trying to hold it and hold it from coming out, i parked my car and ran my but as quickly as possible towards the mcdonalds restroom, but halfway to the restroom i started shitting on myself! **** i thought, but there was no time left byt he time i got into the restroom i had shit all over my boxers and my nice lugz jeans, dam what a horrible mess i thought to myself, i must have spent thirty minutes inside that washroom trying to wipe my whole legs with cheap ass thin toilet papers. The stink was very bad but i got used to it, about 15minutes later of wiping my shit i heard a voice say, "did somebody die in there?" i didnt want to talk back because i already felt dumb and embarassed, so i simply flushed the toilet to make it sound like somebody was in there. anyways, the worst part was leaving my boxer shorts and my socks full of shit inside the washroom, i couldnt take them with me outside because there were people eating and would wonder what the heck i was doing with a wet and stained boxer short and socks- yes it was that my crap even got into my socks! but the worst is yet to come- i had no boxers and no socks, my nice lugz jeans was stained with crap inside. i had to wear something so i put on my stained jeans, dam i could feel the crap inside and it was rubbing on my legs! the smell was horrible. i had to drive back home which was about twenty minutes of driving, meaning i would have to sit and drive my car, while my stained jeans filled with crap rub against my legs, my hands were also stained, i didnt have time to shampoo it in the mcdonalds washroom because i wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible before someone i know shows up and i will be just be more humiliated. So, i finally got home and the first thing i did was throw my stained jeans into the laundry and jumped in the shower.
this is a true story i thought i would share with you guys, i know its disgusting but its the truth, i guess the main reason i wrote it here is because ill probably look back at this thread a year from now and laugh my ass off.. anyways peace.
this is a true story i thought i would share with you guys, i know its disgusting but its the truth, i guess the main reason i wrote it here is because ill probably look back at this thread a year from now and laugh my ass off.. anyways peace.
