As I am half Polish I post this in a humorous light. Not to offend anyone.

Over the years I have tried to use humor to make the mundane a bit more fun. For example when arriving at a restaurant and being asked by the Hostess or Host if I have a reservation? I will sometimes respond with:

 

Upon reading your entry, I came to realize that you and I must have the same sense of humor.

My wife says that I tend to leave people either scratching their head or laughing.


Many times in the checkout line, I notice a clerk who is clearly unhappy to be there. I usually pull up some idiotic line that makes them think.

Thats just the kind of guy I am.

 

They either get it, or not.

Today, I met a friend of mine for lunch. When the waitress came over and asked if "we needed anything else" (BTW, IMHO she should have asked if we would like anything else. As we may not have needed desert, but wanted one.) I responded with: "A vacation" . She was taken back for a second and then came back with the suggestion that I take a mini vacation. She had just come back from a long weekend to Tampa, FL and said that she had a good time.

 

How many times have you been served in a restaurant by someone who says "there you go" when they put down the plate. My reply is usually where? Or really!
I usually get a blank stare.

 

I usually reply: Where am I going, or where would you like me to go? >>> Blank stares.

My other favorite to answering people's questions in the fashion in which they answer them is literal.

Question: Excuse me, do you know what time it is?
Response: After looking at my watch, is Yes.

Why don't they ask the proper question? Excuse me, could you please tell me what time it is?

 

[QUOTE=Matt_in_VA,Jan 31 2007, 06:27 PM] Why don't they ask the proper question?

 

"You mean, now?"

JonasM

 

The two expressions that annoy me the most are:

Have a nice one.

I'm always tempted to ask "A nice one what?". Unfortunately I know that I'd only be talking to myself so I just shrug my shoulders and walk away. I know the person saying it is just trying to be nice, but I find it to be a silly phrase.

The other one happens in restaurants when the server, within minutes of putting down the plate, comes to the table and asks, "How is everything?". I'm always tempted to go into a long dialog about the war in Iraq, the state of healthcare, inflation, the trade deficit and etc., and then look at the server and say, "Now you tell me how everything is." I know that for the most part the servers really don't care how everything is and they're just asking because they're supposed to, so I never go into my dialog. Instead I just say fine so that they will go away and let my wife and myself enjoy our dinner.

 

Yes, that is somewhat annoying.

However, it's also annoying when your order is screwed up in a way that wasn't obvious until you started eating it, but you can't find your server to get it fixed.

Damned if you do....

 

Yes, that is the irony of eating out. When you want to be left alone to enjoy your meal and the people you are dining with, the servers find their way to your table every 30 seconds. When you need them for something, they're nowhere to be found.