We went to a neat pub in a small town 30 miles away tonight for the first time in two plus years thanks to Covid. Great pizza. You have to love the small town friendliness (800 people). The waitress asked me if I still had the small sportscar. One evening years back we closed the place and when we went to leave my MG would not start so I had to get a tow truck and we waited inside. It was the only time so far that the MG left us stranded. I had a spare generator with me but I wasn’t about to change it at midnight. Tonight was a nice reminder of how nice people can be and to recall something like that.

My wife said tonight, “We need more friends.” I couldn’t agree more. Why else would I be typing this at 2:30am. Cause I couldn’t sleep thinking about how do you go about getting new friends to hang with. It goes without saying that many of our friends have died, divorced, moved for good, moved for the season, broken up for one reason or another, or just changed enough that they are no fun to be with.

We used to be part of a few weekend circles that are no more. So we are left with friends to often that are too often too far away to get together for an evening out. We are looking forward to a car club event at the end of the month where we will spend a couple days and an over night with close friends but that’s 10 days off. We have both been retired so long the work connection is long gone. Donna's horse friends all seem to live some distance away as do my car buddies.

I really don’t have any answers. I suggested we consider joining something like the Eagles club. Any ideas?

 

Volunteer, join a group like Big Brothers or Meals on Wheels, look for a community group that shares your interests. You never just gain friends, you make them. Local area interest groups are a good place to start.

 

My mother is part of an Eagles club , it started when she would live in Florida 3-6 months per year. She is 94 and she still dances up a storm when she attends their clubs, and apparently she can be part of any of their affiliated clubs around the country. She enjoys going there for different food events, drinks, and dancing etc. I don't know what else happens there but she found a lot of friends through that organization. Being a Canadian in Florida it was a bit of a task finding American friends but she met quite a few. She now corresponds with some of those friends throughout the US.

 

We go to a lot of happy hours at the beach and prefer sitting at the bar. We always have conversations with folks sitting near us. Some are regulars like us and some have become friends. We have a lot in common with them. They are old empty nesters like us who like to drink and have fun. Life’s a beach is our common bond.

 

While that is a way to get to know others in the community, it is not in our nature to do that.

 

Now that is more in our nature to do that. We love beach bars but don't have any. Over the years we have met with and got to know several people at pubs but nothing stays the same forever. One of our long standing groups broke up when one of the son's got drunk and beat up one of the other's daughter. He lost his management job, went to jail and ruined his life. The group splittered and stopped meeting.

We have been members at local club for a long time and can meet up with another long standing group any Tuesday taco night.

I guess what we are hoping to find is another couple who like to have a few drinks, laugh, eat, and have similar interests. We regularly meet mid-week with our closest friends at a lake deck bar and have a great time. We each drive 30 miles to meet there. It would be great to find another couple that we hit it off with that lived closer.

Tomorrow I'm going to vintage sports car races where I will be with a dozen or more car buddies...... but its not a couple's thing.

 

Sounds like our kinda people. That's fabulous that she can dance at her age..

 

Take up golf. The frustrations you will experience are almost worth it thanks to the friends you will make.

 

Dave,

I know that you and Donna enjoy (or used to enjoy) dancing. Why not look for a group of seniors who line dance. Liz and I don't participate but a number of people here do, and as a result of the weekly line dancing sessions many have become fast friends.

 

I know that is an excellent why to meet people who like to get out and about. I've never played a single hole on a real course. These days my shoulders would never allow it.