The Bored at work thread
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From: 3rd bedroom on the right
Nah Im off alcohol for a month. No seriously I am, exams are coming up and Im trying to get serious about training for a while so I thought it would be a good test to see if I could do it 
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 2,840
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From: Sydney
Tonight we welcome the teapots. Welcome the teapots into our minds. Hello teapots. Your minds are not in mind, however your feet might very well be. Not all of you have feet though, which I find incredibly strange. Some of you just have flat bottoms to sit on. Possibly you have been sitting too long and have lost the need for feet and therefore lost these feet in order to have evolved flat bottoms. Others of you have three feet, none have two. The balance. The balance is where it's at. With two feet you do not balance, that is why you need three feet.
Feet to stand on, not to sit on. As I said before, lack of feet usage equals flat bottoms. So don't stand on your flat bottoms. But that previous sentence made no sense. It seems I just typed that in order to type a "counter", or some other type of word which elludes me right now. Thesaurus maybe? If that is really how it is spelt but I don't think it is. That would tell me the word I am searching for. But if I don't know what the word is why would it be there and more importantly why would I be searching for it.
Wherever I may roam. Where ever I may roam. That just sounds stupid. Where ever you may roam. Who cares? who really cares? I mean, come on. You roam... What the hell? Just be. Roam? pft.. whatever.
Ok, now there are little figurines on my desk. If you would call them figurines that is. Cause they're really pewter toys. But really, they aren't toys. They're just little statues. But I wouldn't go so far as to call them statues. They're not really. A statue to me is huge. But these aren't huge. They are facing each other right now. Looking all angry. They have a red light below them. But it only appears below them because they are above the red light. But not "above" in the sense that they are "on-top-of" but above in the sense that they are above the light. You don't understand. But that's fine. I could show you. But I don't really want to.
Anyway, I should move. Moving is the key to getting around. Night everyone.
And I'm back again. Typing away.
I thought I should also mention the green lights that are below the red one. The toys really are toys. They're just not toys that you play with. They're the kind of toy that you just look at. Now why do people make things just to look at them? I don't understand this. Well I do. But right now I am unable to comprehend the thought process behind saying, "lets make something to look at".
Why not just make things that do something. Something useful preferably. Or something that makes something useful. Like a skeleton earing for example. That's something useful. I have one right here hanging off the stand of a microphone. Now I'm going to explain why I have a microphone near my computer whether you like it or not. It's there because I record music here. The microphone that is, not the skeleton earing. That's there because it was left over from a halloween costume that once was, but isn't anymore. Am I being too vague? I can be more specific. The costume existed at one stage. But because it no longer exists in full it does not exist anymore, therefore it "isn't anymore".
Ok. ok. okay. Now back to the toys. They aren't toys. Nor are they statues. But you cannot play with them. So don't try. You can ask me if you want to. Ask me if you can play with them that is, and I won't mind you asking me. Well, at the moment I won't mind you asking me.
So anyway, just... they're not toys.
Ok I'm back yet again.
I want to see if the pages will update. I don't know why. But they might update. I don't know what I mean by "update" either. So just bear with me a second. It might become clear as to what I am talking about.
Right now it's perfectly clear to me. "update" it's a word. Has a meaning. That meaning is something I could explain if I wanted to. But the fact is I don't really want to right now. Not sure why that is either. Just don't feel like explaining it.
So will the pages update? I hope not. I don't want the pages to update to a new page. It's not right. Breaks everything up you see. Just stops the continuity of the whole thing, and continuity is a good thing. Something to be wantful of that is. Continuity is what you should be wantful of. Is wantful a word by the way? I'm not sure. I'm sure it could be. But I don't write dictionaries. If I did I'd be boring...possibly. Although I've never actually met a dictionary writer. Do they have such things, "Dictionary writers". I believe they have some conglomerate of people that decide what goes into certain dictionaries, but other than that I couldn't really care less about what I'm talking about right now ay.
So how is everyone? Having a good time? I sure hope so. Even those people that I hate. There is one person that I hate. Well maybe I don't hate her. She never really did anything but hey, it doesn't matter. It was a stepping stone. So many good things happened afterwards. After after after! It's all happy. There's a rainbow outside my window.
The rainbow isn't singing however, which is a little depressing. I can hear the rainbow connection in my head. For lovers and dreamers.... oh soo sweet. What a sweet song. Kermit the frog. Beautiful song that. Reminds me of some really good times.
Did you know that there are people that actually think I can sing? It's amazing. I've sung a few times in front of people, but normally when doing acoustic gig's I insist that my vocal mix is down. You see when we do acoustic gigs, now you don't want to hear about this possibly, but I'm gonna tell it anyway... where was I? Oh.. When we do acoustic gigs you see, it's just me, my singer and both of us have our acoustics in front of us. Anyway, we play lots of songs. I get so lost in the performance. It's amazing. Connecting with the audience or connecting with that one special person. Totally amazing.
The nerves before going onstage though. Oh the nerves. They are something I so crave very much. I love the nerves. It's a massive hit of adrenalin. After hitting that first chord or note though, heaven. Heaven ensues. Nothing else in the world like that.
Heaven is a stage, and I am it's master. Scream, and mosh before me. I love you all.
Feet to stand on, not to sit on. As I said before, lack of feet usage equals flat bottoms. So don't stand on your flat bottoms. But that previous sentence made no sense. It seems I just typed that in order to type a "counter", or some other type of word which elludes me right now. Thesaurus maybe? If that is really how it is spelt but I don't think it is. That would tell me the word I am searching for. But if I don't know what the word is why would it be there and more importantly why would I be searching for it.
Wherever I may roam. Where ever I may roam. That just sounds stupid. Where ever you may roam. Who cares? who really cares? I mean, come on. You roam... What the hell? Just be. Roam? pft.. whatever.
Ok, now there are little figurines on my desk. If you would call them figurines that is. Cause they're really pewter toys. But really, they aren't toys. They're just little statues. But I wouldn't go so far as to call them statues. They're not really. A statue to me is huge. But these aren't huge. They are facing each other right now. Looking all angry. They have a red light below them. But it only appears below them because they are above the red light. But not "above" in the sense that they are "on-top-of" but above in the sense that they are above the light. You don't understand. But that's fine. I could show you. But I don't really want to.
Anyway, I should move. Moving is the key to getting around. Night everyone.
And I'm back again. Typing away.
I thought I should also mention the green lights that are below the red one. The toys really are toys. They're just not toys that you play with. They're the kind of toy that you just look at. Now why do people make things just to look at them? I don't understand this. Well I do. But right now I am unable to comprehend the thought process behind saying, "lets make something to look at".
Why not just make things that do something. Something useful preferably. Or something that makes something useful. Like a skeleton earing for example. That's something useful. I have one right here hanging off the stand of a microphone. Now I'm going to explain why I have a microphone near my computer whether you like it or not. It's there because I record music here. The microphone that is, not the skeleton earing. That's there because it was left over from a halloween costume that once was, but isn't anymore. Am I being too vague? I can be more specific. The costume existed at one stage. But because it no longer exists in full it does not exist anymore, therefore it "isn't anymore".
Ok. ok. okay. Now back to the toys. They aren't toys. Nor are they statues. But you cannot play with them. So don't try. You can ask me if you want to. Ask me if you can play with them that is, and I won't mind you asking me. Well, at the moment I won't mind you asking me.
So anyway, just... they're not toys.
Ok I'm back yet again.
I want to see if the pages will update. I don't know why. But they might update. I don't know what I mean by "update" either. So just bear with me a second. It might become clear as to what I am talking about.
Right now it's perfectly clear to me. "update" it's a word. Has a meaning. That meaning is something I could explain if I wanted to. But the fact is I don't really want to right now. Not sure why that is either. Just don't feel like explaining it.
So will the pages update? I hope not. I don't want the pages to update to a new page. It's not right. Breaks everything up you see. Just stops the continuity of the whole thing, and continuity is a good thing. Something to be wantful of that is. Continuity is what you should be wantful of. Is wantful a word by the way? I'm not sure. I'm sure it could be. But I don't write dictionaries. If I did I'd be boring...possibly. Although I've never actually met a dictionary writer. Do they have such things, "Dictionary writers". I believe they have some conglomerate of people that decide what goes into certain dictionaries, but other than that I couldn't really care less about what I'm talking about right now ay.
So how is everyone? Having a good time? I sure hope so. Even those people that I hate. There is one person that I hate. Well maybe I don't hate her. She never really did anything but hey, it doesn't matter. It was a stepping stone. So many good things happened afterwards. After after after! It's all happy. There's a rainbow outside my window.
The rainbow isn't singing however, which is a little depressing. I can hear the rainbow connection in my head. For lovers and dreamers.... oh soo sweet. What a sweet song. Kermit the frog. Beautiful song that. Reminds me of some really good times.
Did you know that there are people that actually think I can sing? It's amazing. I've sung a few times in front of people, but normally when doing acoustic gig's I insist that my vocal mix is down. You see when we do acoustic gigs, now you don't want to hear about this possibly, but I'm gonna tell it anyway... where was I? Oh.. When we do acoustic gigs you see, it's just me, my singer and both of us have our acoustics in front of us. Anyway, we play lots of songs. I get so lost in the performance. It's amazing. Connecting with the audience or connecting with that one special person. Totally amazing.
The nerves before going onstage though. Oh the nerves. They are something I so crave very much. I love the nerves. It's a massive hit of adrenalin. After hitting that first chord or note though, heaven. Heaven ensues. Nothing else in the world like that.
Heaven is a stage, and I am it's master. Scream, and mosh before me. I love you all.
Thread Starter
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Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 2,840
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From: Sydney
And yet again I'm back.
I'm feeling like describing my whole stage experience. Each one is very different though. But the underlying feelings behind all of the experiences is the same. I feel like describing this to you as though I were making love to you for the very first time. Except it would be a different kind of "making love to you for the very first time". Because, come on. We all have to admit the "very first time" is pretty much not that crash hot. It can be pretty cool. But not the best in my experience. I mean, there's the problem of shaking...well, I get the shaking thing. It's not the nerves though. It's the fact that I'm just so damn full of adrenalin and so damn nervous about what she is going to think. So then I guess it is nerves. So sue me, I lied.
Anyway, back to making love for the first time. Amazing thing. Sensual. Getting lost in the moment. I remember the moment. So very well. Was a good moment. Though incredibly f'ing short. Anyway, I wasn't going to tell you about making love. I was going to tell you about stage experiences. Ok. moving on.
Ok.. now. Being on stage. Something that is the most nerve racking thing I've ever experienced. But something I crave with ever last inch of my being. I crave the performance. I crave the noise. The feeling. The sounds. All of it. I crave.
The nervousness beforehand is not something you get use to. Everytime, without question I will have the thought, "hell i don't want to do this. Look at them, they're gonna eat me alive". Everytime before I go out on stage that thought enters my mind. When I'm called to get ready, and I strap my guitar on and make sure everything "feels" right... Everything must feel right. If it doesn't anxiety attacks occurs. Very bad. Ask my band mates about it... anyway, back to being called. "Your up in 5". Heart races. Impending doom, impending doom. That's what I think for some unknown reason.
Anyway, the 5 minutes takes hours. But as soon as I hear "your up". My heart skips a beat and my body goes into auto-mode. Up onto the stage I go. I much prefer to be where I cannot see the audience until I am actually on the stage. But that isn't always the case though. Anyway, I digress. Suddenly I find myself on the stage. Daniel (my singer) and I always share a look just before it starts. It's not quite a look of, "this is it", or "here we go". It's a look af reassurance. His look reassure's me, and I think mine does the same to him. A quick squiz at my amp, make sure all the tubes are glowing nicely. Strum that low E, and chug.... let it reverberate.... soundcheck.. ahh..I feel invincible... growl. I'm in my element. This is it.
One look at Avis (drummer), click click......here we go.
I'm feeling like describing my whole stage experience. Each one is very different though. But the underlying feelings behind all of the experiences is the same. I feel like describing this to you as though I were making love to you for the very first time. Except it would be a different kind of "making love to you for the very first time". Because, come on. We all have to admit the "very first time" is pretty much not that crash hot. It can be pretty cool. But not the best in my experience. I mean, there's the problem of shaking...well, I get the shaking thing. It's not the nerves though. It's the fact that I'm just so damn full of adrenalin and so damn nervous about what she is going to think. So then I guess it is nerves. So sue me, I lied.
Anyway, back to making love for the first time. Amazing thing. Sensual. Getting lost in the moment. I remember the moment. So very well. Was a good moment. Though incredibly f'ing short. Anyway, I wasn't going to tell you about making love. I was going to tell you about stage experiences. Ok. moving on.
Ok.. now. Being on stage. Something that is the most nerve racking thing I've ever experienced. But something I crave with ever last inch of my being. I crave the performance. I crave the noise. The feeling. The sounds. All of it. I crave.
The nervousness beforehand is not something you get use to. Everytime, without question I will have the thought, "hell i don't want to do this. Look at them, they're gonna eat me alive". Everytime before I go out on stage that thought enters my mind. When I'm called to get ready, and I strap my guitar on and make sure everything "feels" right... Everything must feel right. If it doesn't anxiety attacks occurs. Very bad. Ask my band mates about it... anyway, back to being called. "Your up in 5". Heart races. Impending doom, impending doom. That's what I think for some unknown reason.
Anyway, the 5 minutes takes hours. But as soon as I hear "your up". My heart skips a beat and my body goes into auto-mode. Up onto the stage I go. I much prefer to be where I cannot see the audience until I am actually on the stage. But that isn't always the case though. Anyway, I digress. Suddenly I find myself on the stage. Daniel (my singer) and I always share a look just before it starts. It's not quite a look of, "this is it", or "here we go". It's a look af reassurance. His look reassure's me, and I think mine does the same to him. A quick squiz at my amp, make sure all the tubes are glowing nicely. Strum that low E, and chug.... let it reverberate.... soundcheck.. ahh..I feel invincible... growl. I'm in my element. This is it.
One look at Avis (drummer), click click......here we go.
--->
