Ask Unkie Trunkie!
Thread Starter
Moderator
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 109,435
Likes: 1,651
From: SJC
Originally Posted by WestSideBilly,Feb 4 2010, 04:56 PM
Hippie is pretty good about keeping the vaseline usage in his personal space.
Joined: May 2001
Posts: 93,305
Likes: 820
From: Nowhere
Originally Posted by 8D_In_Trunk,Feb 4 2010, 06:00 PM
That's good to hear. I'm coming up at least once this year, and I expect the couch unfettered.
Thread Starter
Moderator
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 109,435
Likes: 1,651
From: SJC
Originally Posted by brantshali,Feb 4 2010, 05:26 PM
Will my house sell this month?
. . . contingencies will close in March.
Former Moderator
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 52,827
Likes: 17
From: State of Confusion
Originally Posted by 8D_In_Trunk,Feb 4 2010, 06:20 PM
No. Your hopes will be dashed because of the buyers demanding a coin be placed in the northwest corner of the yard to enhance the Feng Shui.
. . . contingencies will close in March.
. . . contingencies will close in March.
Joined: Aug 2002
Posts: 28,136
Likes: 8
From: Seattle, Washington
Originally Posted by 8D_In_Trunk,Feb 4 2010, 04:48 PM
I understand that sir, but I will look upon thee with some dismay if you choose to become complicit in your own oppression. . . then complain about it.
Thread Starter
Moderator
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 109,435
Likes: 1,651
From: SJC
Originally Posted by bahula03,Feb 4 2010, 07:30 PM
I'm trying to send you a message on facebook...but the message I've copied to forward is too big. Ridiculous.
We'll wait for all of the information, then I'll rant.
Thread Starter
Moderator
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 109,435
Likes: 1,651
From: SJC
Originally Posted by bahula03,Feb 4 2010, 07:13 PM
Deal, so long as only first-hand complaints count.
1. WSB rants about some theoretical girl what-have-you regarding Hippie. WSB has every right, as he lives (platonically, AFAIK) with Hippie.
2. Hippie feigns being irate.
3. Hippie then forwards me a message from the lady in question. Letter goes to the effect of,
Oh Hippie, I talked to you one time, and now I'm moist. I asked two friends of yours if it was okay to be moist over you, and they said yes. I'm going to obsess over you now. I hope to see you at a party. Hugs, Flowers, and My Little Ponies farting hugs and flowers. . . blah blah blah
Sincerely writing my name with your last name,
Crazy Beeyotch
Sincerely writing my name with your last name,
Crazy Beeyotch
Having dated a couple of somewhat-crazy chicks, let me assure you, you should consider tapping this! She will be crazy, obsessed, and willing to indulge in many, if not all, of your fantasies and whims. The mental instability will make her genitals a raging waterpark of endless fun. . . until it isn't.
BEFORE doing this, make sure you have the following assured:
A. If she knows where you live, then you must bail now. Forget it. End of story. Walk away now.
B. If she can get your information within 5 minutes. Forget it. Walk away.
C. You may only hit this 3 times, tops. Preferably once.
D. You must close at her place, or, at an arbitrary location. Any Mo-mo off of 99 is okay, AFAIC. Spend a little cash.
E. If she insists on closing at your place. Say no. You have roommates, and you have a strict no overnight visitors policy (try not to laugh when you say this).
F. Condoms are mandatory.
G. Closing mid-week is not a crime.
H. When you meet her at the location, understand that you have 45 minutes to meet her, say, "Hello," get the number, and then proceed to ignore her. In fact, talk to every chick in the place. Be courteous, and genteel, but not too courteous or genteel.
Understand, this is porking. Do this; it builds character.
Save the nice girls for when you're ready to be miserable.