On the bedpost overnight
A dollar is a dollar & a dime is a dime!
He'd sing another chorus
But he hasn't got the time
On the bedpost overnight, yeah!

 

Well, I had two weeks of vacation time coming
After workin' all year down at Big Roy's Heating and Plumbing
So one night, when my family and I were gathered round the dinner table, I said
"Kids... If you could go anywhere in this great big world
Now Where'd you like to go to?"

 

They said, "Dad, We wanna see the biggest ball of twine in Minnesota"
They picked the biggest ball of twine in Minnesota
So the very next day we loaded up the car with potato skins and pickled weiners
Crossword puzzles, Spiderman comics and mama's homemade rhubarb pie
Pulled out of the driveway, and the neighbors, they all waved goodbye

 

And so began our three-day journey
We picked up a guy holdin' a sign that said "Twine Ball or Bust"
He smelled real bad, and he said his name was Bernie.

 

I put in a Slim Whitman tape
My wife put on a brand new hair net
The kids were in the back seat jumpin' up and down
Yellin' "Are we there yet?"

 

And all of us were joined together in one common thought
As we rolled down the long and winding Interstate in our '53 DeSota
We're gonna see the biggest ball of twine in Minnesota!!
We're headin' for the biggest ball of twine in Minnesota!!

 

Oh, we couldn't wait to get there, so we drove straight through
For three whole days and nights
(Of course, we stopped for more pickled weiners now and then)
The scenery was just so pretty

 

But you can't see out of the side of the car
Because the windows are completely covered
With the decals from all the places where we've already been

 

Like Elvis-a-Rama, the Tupperware Museum
The Boll Weevil Monument, and Cranberry World
The Shuffleboard Hall of Fame, Poodle Dog Rock
And the Mecca of Albino Squirrels

 

Isn’t it ironic ?