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Oldies but Goldies......

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Old 07-29-2002, 08:02 PM
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Default Oldies but Goldies......
[COLOR=royalblue] In a thinly veiled attempt to boost my post count (as if I really need to !! ) here are some
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Old 07-29-2002, 08:04 PM
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.
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Old 07-29-2002, 08:05 PM
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So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give me a lift?" I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it."
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Old 07-29-2002, 08:06 PM
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Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands.

Police say that he topped himself.
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Old 07-29-2002, 08:07 PM
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. They lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
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Old 07-29-2002, 08:08 PM
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I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a muscle.
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Old 07-29-2002, 08:09 PM
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My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. He was pulled in by a strong currant.
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Old 07-29-2002, 08:10 PM
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I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf.

And he said, "No, the steaks are too high."
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Old 07-29-2002, 08:11 PM
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I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.
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Old 07-29-2002, 08:12 PM
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Luke's home phone answering machine message

"...If you want to buy marijuana, press the hash key..."


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