I better get a stronger bed.. So I went down to ...

 

nasa. they said that given the proper modifications, the orthobed 3000 could withstand...

 

the payload capacity of the Space Shuttle.. Speaking of the Space Shuttle I also found out that...

 

...when you ejaculate in outter space your semen is weighless and you have to be very careful because if you get it in your eyes it can....

 

ruin a perfectly good color contact lens. So you should always, always...

 

...wear a helmet when masterbating. It will protect your eyes and your...

 

...reputation if somebody (like your mother) walks in on you in mid stream.....

 

...and somehow gets pregnant from you floating sperm. Though the chances are rare there is a one in 100 chance that either of the to will happen. Safe space sex strickly requires the use of the orbital helmet along with lubricating...

 

.,....every internal surface of the space ship with sperm killer, specially made by......

 

elves commanded by a big fat guy who only works one day a year. all the other days he...