There is no egg in the eggplant, no ham in the hamburger and neither pine nor apple in the pineapple. English muffins were not invented in England, French fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted. But if we examine its paradoxes we find that Quicksand takes you down slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing. If the plural of tooth is teeth, shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth? If the teacher taught, why didn't the preacher praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what the heck does a humanitarian eat!?

Why do people recite at a play, yet play at a recital? Park on driveways and drive on parkways? Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist? Why are wise men and wise guys opposites? Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things? If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make terrible? Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one? If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked and dry cleaners depressed? If people from Poland are called "Poles," why aren't people from Holland called "Holes? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language where a house can burn up as it burns down and in which you fill in a form by filling it out. And a bell is only heard once it goes!

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race (which of course isn't a race at all). That is why when the stars are out they are visible, but when the lights are out they are invisible.

And why it is that when I wind up my watch it starts but when I wind up this story ends?

 

After reading this, it makes sense as to why it took me 3 years of speech classes in grade school to grasp the concept of the english language, Yet I was born here. Now that I ve' got a grasp on English, I'm starting to forget my spanish. I can still speak it but my words don't flow out as proper as the spanish language should be. Oh well, Asi es la vida ( that's life)
girlzrace2
white/red 01'

 

Thanks for the post, good reading!

 

Oink,
would you like to learn Piggish?

 

Very cool observation.

 

Suddenly it doesn't seem so strange that a shipment goes overland and cargo travels by sea...

 

Weren't hamburgers invented in Hamburg Germany?

I may be wrong, very wrong that is.

 

English is great. I just love when Carlin or Gallger get off on a rant about the language.

One mouse two mice
One house two Hice?
One blouse two blice?

Why are comb, bomb, and tomb pronounced the same, etc.

Now I know why we speak but don't communicate

 

Or why we park in driveways and drive on parkways...english really is weird.

 

That's "American English" we English English don't drive on Parkways!!