Girlfriends past is bothering me!
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Like these guys said, have fun -- but remember to be careful. Being hurt can make you grow and learn things about yourself, but it's not always the most pleasant experience, so try to save yourself some grief in the long run by really thinking things through.
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From: NVA
Originally Posted by S2000 SM,Nov 18 2004, 09:07 AM
All of the "grow up" comments are a tad patronising guys..... Come on, who hasn't been in their teens/twenty-somethings and been sure you love someone so much you'll explode. Ok us thirty-somethings ( 
) know he'll get over it and move on, but there'll still be a broken heart involved.
As for advice:
Two at 18 isn't so bad. It's her attitude that seems the issue (for you especially). Guys tend to fall into two groups IMHO - those that do care about the past and those that don't. Welcome to the first camp.
If this is how you feel, you won't change her and you won't change you. Either
the ar$e of her or get someone more "homely" (and don't get cross when your sweet homely girl won't perform sexual gymnastics).
Either way mate, at 17, this is unlikely to be your last girlfriend .....
) know he'll get over it and move on, but there'll still be a broken heart involved.As for advice:
Two at 18 isn't so bad. It's her attitude that seems the issue (for you especially). Guys tend to fall into two groups IMHO - those that do care about the past and those that don't. Welcome to the first camp.
If this is how you feel, you won't change her and you won't change you. Either
the ar$e of her or get someone more "homely" (and don't get cross when your sweet homely girl won't perform sexual gymnastics).Either way mate, at 17, this is unlikely to be your last girlfriend .....
I was once in the exact same position as you... except she had been with 6 guys before me, and I, well, was still a virgin... so imagine how much HER past bothered me... trust me, moving on was the best thing I couldve done.
Im not dissing girls who've made mistakes, guys make mistakes too. Aside from that, I call my MALE friends whores ALL the time. I dont differentiate between a girl sleeping around, and a guy sleeping around. To me, they both consitute as being whorish... when AT THE LEAST, theyre not even involved in a relationship.
Anyway, youve done it... so who are you to judge... right?
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From: Colorado Springs
I wouldn't call her decision to sleep with someone else, mistakes. She probably doesn't regret it, and it's this kids issue with himself and his insecurities, not her actions. Therein lies the problem, how does he become comfortable enough with who he is, that he can accept her for who she is?
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From: MoCo
[QUOTE=S2000 SM,Nov 18 2004, 10:07 AM]All of the "grow up" comments are a tad patronising guys..... Come on, who hasn't been in their teens/twenty-somethings and been sure you love someone so much you'll explode.
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From: Seattle
Originally Posted by spdlmtna,Nov 19 2004, 10:58 AM
I dont get it... I keep running into a lot of virgins around here in VA, so to me, 2 by 18 who werent reltionship oriented, consitute her as being a whore.
In addition, don't get caught up with one girl. Doesn't sound like she's the one if your knit-picking little bullsh!t!........ and even if you had mixed feelings she might be the one you haven't been with her long enough anyways.
Respect her and she'll respect you back, but if you're having trouble with that b/c of her past. Let her go dude...
yet? You probably got another one lined up already 
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A lot of guys seem to find it hard to come to grips with the fact that their woman had a sexual history before they arrived on the scene. We have to label everything. Either she's a goddess or a slut.
So she has a sexual history. From what you've outlined above it certainly doesn't seem like much to worry about. If you love her as you say then just accept her for who she is now. It's not like she has done an abnormal amount of bonking around. Two people for heaven's sake. What did you expect? A virgin?
It sounds like she probably holds herself in a higher regard than you do and that any perceived lack of respect is more your issue than hers. There are far more important things to consider in a relationship, like trust, fidelity, compatability, companionship etc.
Stop worrying. People have sex. It's normal. If she's not what you want move on and if she is then just enjoy her company and stop sweating on her past.
So she has a sexual history. From what you've outlined above it certainly doesn't seem like much to worry about. If you love her as you say then just accept her for who she is now. It's not like she has done an abnormal amount of bonking around. Two people for heaven's sake. What did you expect? A virgin?
It sounds like she probably holds herself in a higher regard than you do and that any perceived lack of respect is more your issue than hers. There are far more important things to consider in a relationship, like trust, fidelity, compatability, companionship etc.
Stop worrying. People have sex. It's normal. If she's not what you want move on and if she is then just enjoy her company and stop sweating on her past.