I feel your pain, man. This has happened to me a few times. I'll tell you what, though, my 2 best female friends are girls that I'd asked out while not knowing each had a boyfriend at the time. In fact, my absolute best friend in Philadelphia is a girl I knew from my gym. I talked to her for hours every day for about a month. I finally worked up the courage to ask her out, and she immediately told me about her boyfriend (never mentioned him the the past though. . . thanks a lot). Anyway, I ran into her out a few times, and everything was cool. We planned to go out for drinks a few times, just as friends. Turns out we got along really well, but realized that we'd never date regardless of our situations. Now we're pretty much best friends. We hang out every weekend, and proabably talk/e-mail once a day. We give each other dating advice, go out on double dates, and set each other up with members of the opposite sex. She's been broken up with her boyfriend of over a year now. She and I have never once bothered to try dating, it's just not in the cards. We're content as friends.

So, I guess the moral of this story is to not worry too much about a girl having a boyfriend. Hey, if you didn't know her before asking her out, you've not lost anything by not going out with her. But, you never know, you may just have met a new friend.

Oh. . . one thing to look out for: her ex-boyfriend hates me more than any other human on earth. I'm not sure why, other than the fact that she and I are friends, and she and he are broken up (I usually stayed out of thier relationship issues, and even took his side a few times). Yes, it's come to blows between he and I. I can live with that. Plus one friend, plus one enemy, so I guess I'm even.

 

They sure do... It happened to me, but within 4 years, we were
married. Keep the friend, but keep looking for others too. That
made my wife jealous (before we started dating), and she eventually
dumped the guy and called me up.

 

Thought I'd chime in really quick...

First, thanks for the feedback, it's good to know I'm not the only one with shit for luck.

As for the girl. I'm not at a complete loss or anything...I actually don't know the girl that well at all. We talk whenever I see her (2-3 times a week at most) and it's rarely about anything really important. She just seems like the kind of girl who's very comfortable in her own skin. Being from India and leaning towards the brown chicks, I find that kind of confidence is rare among a lot of girls I meet from my corner of the world.

Regarding being her friend. Of course...I mean...assuming she'd be down with that whole idea. Next time I bump into her, I'll just make the usual small talk and crack a joke or two. Eventually whatever will happen will happen.

If she's got a guy that treats her like a queen and adores her, then good for her. If not...assuming she's a bright girl...she'll dip and she'll eventually find whatever makes her happy. (Me or no me...) Whatever it is though...I'm pretty much just thrilled that I asked her out. I'm kinda picky about girls I pursue vs. the ones that come after me. If I'm going after them...there's usually a number of good reasons and I'd just like to hope that eventually one of the ones that I pursue will take me up on the coffee offer. Till then...I've got plenty to keep myself busy I suppose.

Ahh well... c'est la vie.

 

Just keep throwing the line out a fish will bite sooner or later. And it might be a keeper

 

You need some training!!! Go here:

Player's Guide

It's a fun site, and if you do have problems (normally) approaching women, this site will give you some tips. Stop being an AFC and become a PUA!!!

ERIK

 

Don't be her friend, unless you have no friends. Definitely don't be her friend expecting it to turn into something more, that is called getting played. Many girls out there will keep guy friends, who think that if they are "nice" enough she will fall in love, so they devote time, money and attention to her, which she gladly accepts meanwhile she will never consider than anything more than a friend.

You can be an aquantance, or you can bang her. That friends shit is for guys who like to torture themselves.

 

[QUOTE]Originally posted by tokyo_james

 

[QUOTE]Originally posted by EndLess_Pain

 

Girls are like parking spaces, all the good ones are taken except for the handicapped. Very, very true... i was engaged to a gal about a year ago who at first seemed to be the perfect sweetie. Stayed at home alot, didnt mess around ( we talked on the phone at all hours of the night like everynight etc...) Was all good.. .until attention was moved away from her mom, then thats when it got ugly, even though i am a medical student, never been introuble with the law, many friends, a S2000 (lol), u get the pic. But somehow since the mom lost that PERSONAL attention i became the enemy, and shit got real crazy, i can give details if anyone cares. But the moral of the story is once a mommas girl, always a mommas girl and no man can replace mommy except from the one she replaces.

 

So just take your time, enjoy your S2000 and dont sweat chicks because when one wants you, you wont have to do crap, they will just come to you and do all the work. Anytime you are unsure whats goin on with a chick its cause nothing is goin on because if they want you then theres no question.