I get what you're saying, but I don't think you should look at it as 'wasting your time' unless you're in a huge hurry to get married and have kids... there are plenty of girls out there, and as a man you'll stay just as attractive to even the young ones for years to come. One of the best things about being a guy.

 

I'm in no rush but I'm at a point where I want some stable direction in my life.

 

I prefer instability. Keeps things interesting so I don't get distracted by something shiny.

Just enjoy the ride, even if the mom's loco.

 

I've been there... and we broke up. Not because her dad didn't like my (hispanic) brown self, but b/c she wanted to party. It's tough but she has to want it at least as much as you do for it to work imho. I'm semi old school in asking the future dad in law, but it's not a deal breaker. So if you both really, really want it, go for it. If there is a shred of doubt, walk away. You can't force stability in life by getting married/settling down.

 

I'm not trying to force stability and it appears that we equally want it but its something that has been on my mind lately.

 

Random question, but are all the siblings dating/married to people who are the same race?

 

31 married to same race

30 single but has dated an ethiopian woman

28 yr old is "seeing" a black guy but single

20 yr old was dating a chinese guy... newly single but wants to date a black guy lol

None of the singles bring any guys/girls home to ever meet or even see the parents though.

 

Go for it then. Like its been said, you are marrying her, not her parents. Having the siblings on you guys' side is a huge plus. Good luck homie. Maybe one day ignorance will die off and people will date people for who they are, not their skin color... eh, who am I kidding. That isn't happening in my lifetime.

 

I think the bigger question you need to ask yourself is- How much of an influence does her mom/parents play in her life right now, and how much will they in the future?

At 22, she's just barely getting her own independence. Time will tell exactly how far she falls away from her family. There is a balance to be found somewhere between totally turning her back on them vs. doing her laundry at home all the time and seeing mommy every week.

Seems like it's time to find out how long that umbilical cord will stretch.

 

She lives on her own has her own business, sees mom maybe once every two weeks. Mom does not have influence over her in the sense of affecting her day to day decisions. This all about mom and not her fam. She will not ditch her siblings and why would she they love me and we hang out every week together. Its all her mom thats it. She tells me every other day that she doesn't care about her mom.

I can be fine with her mom being a jackass to me but not to future offspring and thats where the trouble lies.