I have been meaning to write this letter for some time now and, in light of recent developments, I believe it is appropriate. It is worth noting at the outset that those of us who are still sane, those of us who still have a firm grip on reality, those of us who still maintain that we must respect each other and learn to live together in peace, have an obligation to do more than just observe what Honda is doing from a safe distance. We have an obligation to direct your attention in some detail to the vast and irreparable calamity brought upon us by Honda. We have an obligation to investigate the development of feudalism as a concept. And we have an obligation to snap its dupes out of their trance. Honda is not as bestial-to-the-core or slaphappy as you might think. It's more so. Now there will, no doubt, be unpatriotic manipulative-types out there who will ask, "So what if Honda's underlings fragment the nation into politically disharmonious units? That won't affect me." Such crippled thinking is the best example there is as to why if Honda can't stand the heat, it should get out of the kitchen.

I don't mean to condemn anyone's beliefs, but I, hardheaded cynic that I am, don't want to build castles in the air. I don't want to plan things that I can't yet implement. But I do want to justify condemnation, constructive criticism, and ridicule of Honda and its cold-blooded jibes, because doing so clearly demonstrates how it truly believes that it is a paragon of morality and wisdom. It is just such corrupt megalomania, prolix egoism, and intellectual aberrancy that stirs Honda to trample over the very freedoms and rights that it claims to support. Let me mention again that at no time in the past did subversive, insincere blackguards shamble through the streets of cities, demanding rights they imagine some supernatural power has bestowed upon them. Even Honda's confreres couldn't deal with the full impact of Honda's memoirs. That's why they created "Honda-ism," which is just a sententious excuse to pilfer the national treasure.

As for the lies and exaggerations, it would be charitable of me not to mention that Honda assigns blame to everyone but itself. Fortunately, I am not beset by a spirit of false charity, so I will instead maintain that it shouldn't use scapegoating as a foil to draw anger away from more accurate targets. That would be like asking a question at a news conference and, too angry and passionate to wait for the answer, exiting the auditorium before the response. Both of those actions attack everyone else's pranks. If this letter did nothing else but serve as a beacon of truth, it would be worthy of reading by all right-thinking people. However, this letter's role is much greater than just to restore the ancient traditions that Honda has abandoned.

Honda wants to get me thrown in jail. It can't cite a specific statute that I've violated, but it does believe that there must be some statute. This tells me that the idea of basing our entire society on anal-retentive revisionism is so far from reality, it's laughable. That said, let me continue. Given the gruesome political rhetoric of our times, Honda likes to compare its rodomontades to those that shaped this nation. The comparison, however, doesn't hold up beyond some uselessly broad, superficial similarities that are so vague and pointless, it's not even worth summarizing them.

That doesn't necessarily mean that the doom-and-gloom, it's-too-late crowd always plays right into the hands of the most heinous riffraff I've ever seen, although it might. Rather, it means that when you tell Honda's co-conspirators that Honda has vanity without pride, voluptuousness without taste, and learning without wisdom, they begin to get fidgety, and their eyes begin to wander. They really don't care. They have no interest in hearing that that fact is simply inescapable to any thinking man or woman. "Thinking" is the key word in the previous sentence. If someone were to unleash an unparalleled wave of despotism, I'd rather it be an army of puerile, foolhardy thought police than Honda, because the latter is invidious, while the former are only disorganized. From what I understand, Honda is more concerned with the social acceptability of an idea than with its truth or falsity. Its attendants probably don't realize that, because it's not mentioned in the funny papers or in the movies. Nevertheless, Honda's myrmidons have the temerity to make our lives a living hell and then say that everyone else should do the same. As long as I live, I will be shouting this truth from rooftops and doing everything I can to create and nurture a true spirit of community. Does anybody else feel the way I do, or am I alone in my disgust with Honda?

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I don't know if anyone else has posted this link but here is a link to a handy automatic complaint letter generator.

http://hugin.sigusr1.org/~pakin/complaint/

 

LOL!!!! I was reading that and wondering where the hell you were going.....it didn't make sense until I got to the end.

BTW - Prepare to be flamed by those who don't read the whole thing!

 

I read the whole thing also and I was beginning to think that you or me one had suffered a serious brain fart. Once I used the link I enjoyed it.