I work for a company that sells franchises. Every week we put out a newsletter to our franchise owners. This newsletter includes a "Quote of the Week" selected from quotes submitted by our owners. The quote is usually something to inspire our owners to go work their a$$es off to make millions of dollars. This means it is usually pretty lame and weak (at least to me).

This week's quote:
“It’s your parents’ fault that you are the way you are. It’s your fault if you stay that way.” -Seventeen Magazine.

See what I mean?

Anyway, I'd like to submit a few entertaining quotes to make our marketing person's life more interesting. Any suggestions? Here's one I like...

"In life, don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things." - Unknown

 

John Paul Getty's three steps to becoming rich (paraphrased):

1. Start work very early every morning.
2. Do not leave work till everything is finished.
3. Strike oil.

 

"You're not smart, Dr. Freedman-with-two-'e's; you're dumb: very dumb! But you've met your match in me!"

Col. Flagg, on M*A*S*H

 

Thanks, magician! Any one else?

 

Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable.

-Sidney J. Harris