What's your poison? - A small morsel of silliness
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What's your poison? - A small morsel of silliness
A recent magazine survey, interviewed fifty bartenders and they
were asked if they could identify a customer's personality on what
drinks they ordered.
Although interviewed separately, they concurred on almost all
counts.
WOMEN WHO DRINK:
Drink : Beer.
Personality : Casual, low maintenance; down to earth.
Approach : Invite her to a game of pool.
Drink : Cocktails or Blender drinks with umbrella.
Personality : Flaky, annoying, ditzy, and a pain in the ass.
Approach : Avoid her,unless you want to be her cabin boy.
Drink : Mixed drinks but no umbrellas. eg: Scotch and dry
Personality: Mature, has picky taste; knows what she wants.
Approach: : If she wants you, she'll send YOU a drink. . . . .
Drink : Water
Personality : Pretentious and is looking for a serious relationship.
Approach : Don't.
Drink : Wine - (bottled, not 4 litre cask)
Personality : Conservative and classy, sophisticated.
Approach : Try and weave Paris and clothing into the conversation.
Drink : Bacardi Breezer, Lemon Ruskie, West Coast Cooler, etc
Personality : Easy; thinks she is trendy and sophisticated
actually has absolutely no clue.
Approach : Make her feel smarter than she is
Drink : Baileys.
Personality : Annoying voice, bit of a tart.
Approach : Stand close and mention the alley next to the pub.
Drink : Shots and Slammers (Tequila, Vodka, Aftershock etc.)
Personality : Hangs around with male work pals or looking to get
drunk...and naked.
Approach : Easiest hit in the pub. Nothing to do but wait.
MEN WHO DRINK:
Cider: He's probably under-aged and wants to get laid .
Cheap Domestic Beer : He's poor / student and wants to get laid.
Premium Local Beer : He likes good beer and wants to get laid.
Bitter : He's old, he likes good beer and wants to get laid.
Imported Beer : He likes expensive beer and wants to get laid.
Guinness : The man is a rapist and will get laid one way or another.
Water : He just threw up and is trying to wash the taste out of
his mouth and still wants to get laid . . . .
Wine : He's hoping that the wine thing will give him a
sophisticated image and help him get laid. . . . .
Vodka: Extremely horny hound, would shag a warm scarf... Desperate
to get laid.
Port : Thinks he's sophisticated, secretly likes men and wants to
get laid.
were asked if they could identify a customer's personality on what
drinks they ordered.
Although interviewed separately, they concurred on almost all
counts.
WOMEN WHO DRINK:
Drink : Beer.
Personality : Casual, low maintenance; down to earth.
Approach : Invite her to a game of pool.
Drink : Cocktails or Blender drinks with umbrella.
Personality : Flaky, annoying, ditzy, and a pain in the ass.
Approach : Avoid her,unless you want to be her cabin boy.
Drink : Mixed drinks but no umbrellas. eg: Scotch and dry
Personality: Mature, has picky taste; knows what she wants.
Approach: : If she wants you, she'll send YOU a drink. . . . .
Drink : Water
Personality : Pretentious and is looking for a serious relationship.
Approach : Don't.
Drink : Wine - (bottled, not 4 litre cask)
Personality : Conservative and classy, sophisticated.
Approach : Try and weave Paris and clothing into the conversation.
Drink : Bacardi Breezer, Lemon Ruskie, West Coast Cooler, etc
Personality : Easy; thinks she is trendy and sophisticated
actually has absolutely no clue.
Approach : Make her feel smarter than she is
Drink : Baileys.
Personality : Annoying voice, bit of a tart.
Approach : Stand close and mention the alley next to the pub.
Drink : Shots and Slammers (Tequila, Vodka, Aftershock etc.)
Personality : Hangs around with male work pals or looking to get
drunk...and naked.
Approach : Easiest hit in the pub. Nothing to do but wait.
MEN WHO DRINK:
Cider: He's probably under-aged and wants to get laid .
Cheap Domestic Beer : He's poor / student and wants to get laid.
Premium Local Beer : He likes good beer and wants to get laid.
Bitter : He's old, he likes good beer and wants to get laid.
Imported Beer : He likes expensive beer and wants to get laid.
Guinness : The man is a rapist and will get laid one way or another.
Water : He just threw up and is trying to wash the taste out of
his mouth and still wants to get laid . . . .
Wine : He's hoping that the wine thing will give him a
sophisticated image and help him get laid. . . . .
Vodka: Extremely horny hound, would shag a warm scarf... Desperate
to get laid.
Port : Thinks he's sophisticated, secretly likes men and wants to
get laid.
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