I doubt people appreciate what they get for free as much as what they earn themselves.

 

No flames please since we are all giving our own opinions. Jay turn down the car. I am 28 and have owned 5 cars in my life. I've worked nearly every day since I was 14 1/2 (working permit age in NYC). My father who is upper middle class offered to buy me a car when I first got my license but I refused and bought my first car myself, a 1990 Geo Storm at the age of 18. Whether your parents can afford it or not does not matter. I truly believe that everybody needs to earn and learn on their own. I just bought my first house (a real fix-er upper). My father offered to help with the down payment but I refused so instead of a single family home (which I wanted) I bought a 2 family to help with the mortgage payments. Your parents will always love you, they are your parents. They can show love in many ways. Show yours back by being the best at everything you do. Show them you can stand on your own 2 feet. In the end you will feel better about yourself and they will be proud of you for demonstrating your independence. I can't tell you how happy it makes me feel when my father tells his friends "my son bought his own house". Let him spend his money on that retirement vacation or on himself. If he wants the car let him buy it for himself and you can take it for the occasional spin. Just my thoughts.

 

Hey YoungS2K, just curious...what kind of a part-time job do you have that allows you to be able to purchase an S2K?!? I want a piece of that job!

I've thought about this thoroughly from both my point of view and my parents' point of view. I know they think I'm a good kid, and I like to think they're proud of me so far. One of their reasons for getting me this is that they know I'm responsible, and that I'm going to take care of it as if I paid for it myself. I'm sure people will tell me that I won't really appreciate it like that, which is fine. The most important thing is that I understand what my parents have gone through to get to where they are today, and I do appreciate what they've done for me and respect that.

In general, I think I can rationalize my accepting of the car...even if I tried to turn it down, my dad would just get it anyways and tell me to shut up about the price

 

[QUOTE]Originally posted by enLihtninBoy:
[B]yay! i'm not surrounded by old farts

 

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Jay Li:
[B]My S should be arriving any day now, back in St. Louis.

 

Your right if you feel you don't deserve this car. This car is above being basic transportation and is an adult toy. The fact that you know this and believe this means you have the ability to own this car and your parents have raised you with the proper values. If your parents want to buy you an expensive toy even while paying for your tuition, that is their choice. I hope you can appreciate it. My advice is to feel blessed, not guilty. But try to be sensitive toward people who can't afford this car by not bragging about it.

 

I agree that humility is always a desirable trait, in these circumstances or any other.

Having been the son of parents who were not priveleged (and who could never afford to buy me a car) and the first male in my family to go to college, I am nontheless wary of other self-made men or women who think you can only succeed in life on your own (several current national political candidates defy that argument) and that you have to deny offers of help from family and friends.

Count your lucky stars and be grateful, accept your parent's largesse, but never lose your will to succeed on your own.

 

mingster, I'm Chinese. My parents are from Taiwan, so they're not big fans of mainland China. I know what you mean about how this is another way of my parents showing their love...it tends to be like that with Asian parents. Just for to clear it up, this is not my parents compensating for a lack of love, just another way for them to show it.

 

Ming and Jay, I am also Chinese, parents both born in Shanghai. I was born and lived in Taiwan (8 years), lived in HK for a year. You guys are correct in that Chinese parents do give/spoil their children. But, to often I see Chinese kids accepting it and not earning it. My sister would be a prefect example of this. Jay the fact that you had second thoughts to me, means that you believe you haven't earned it. If it isn't going to be at school with you, tell me what the difference would be to wait until you graduate and earn it. Sorry, but this is a sore spot with me and I have many arguments with my parents concerning my lazy ass sister and her 6 year college plan over this. My parents constantly pay for vacations for her (like she needs one). They bought her a Maxima when she got her license and now want to trade it in for something else as if the fact that it is now 3 years old means she deserves something better.

 

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Jay Li:
[B]Hey YoungS2K, just curious...what kind of a part-time job do you have that allows you to be able to purchase an S2K?!?