Stupid Human Tricks
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Joined: Feb 2003
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From: BROOKVILLE
Stupid Human Tricks
My first stupid human trick happened last week. All of the little "extras" I order for the new "S" had just arrived at the dealer. Just come on down and they will install them. Among this list of add-ons was a car cover. I thanked the service man very much for the offer to install them now, but, well, Memorial day weekend is coming and I just didn't have time till the first week in June.
My second stupid human trick was to leave the door open on my garage. Now mind you, I live in one of those neighborhoods where everybody looks out after everybody else. So I really didn't think it was all that dangerous to leave my new "S" parked in the garage with the door open. Well, as luck would have it, the weather was nasty (It rains more than it shines in PA). I didn't get the "S" out all weekend, and instead, took the CR-V on a trip Monday. When I got back that evening, I went to close up the garage, and there it was - all over the back of the "S" - mud
LOTS OF MUD!
How could this happen? Who hates me this much? What had I done to deserve this? 
I immediately knew it had to be the neighbors kids, clowning around. 
It was then that I committed "stupid human trick" number three. I checked with both of my closest neighbors, and they in turn interrogated their kids. Each neighbor claimed innocence, but just knew that they could find out who did it.
Later, as I was cleaning the mud off the car, one of my neighbors came over to help, and to my
embarassment, pointed out that a barn swallow had been building a nest in the garage above my car. (They build their nests out of mud). Apparently the nest broke from the ledge it was plastered on and "splat" right onto the truck lid and roof of my car.
Of course through all of this I did manage to avoid "stupid human trick" number 4 (calling the police and filing a complaint) and number 5 (not waxing my car). The mud, picked up and deposited by little birdy feet, washed off, leaving no marks. Now I keep the garage door closed and the car cover on. With any luck it will stop raining sometime this year and I can dare the pigeons to------- , well you get the picture.
By the way I did go back to the neighbors and apologized to their kids for my wrongful assumption. Do you ever just feel like and idiot?
My second stupid human trick was to leave the door open on my garage.
Now mind you, I live in one of those neighborhoods where everybody looks out after everybody else. So I really didn't think it was all that dangerous to leave my new "S" parked in the garage with the door open. Well, as luck would have it, the weather was nasty (It rains more than it shines in PA). I didn't get the "S" out all weekend, and instead, took the CR-V on a trip Monday. When I got back that evening, I went to close up the garage, and there it was - all over the back of the "S" - mud LOTS OF MUD! How could this happen? Who hates me this much? What had I done to deserve this? I immediately knew it had to be the neighbors kids, clowning around. It was then that I committed "stupid human trick" number three. I checked with both of my closest neighbors, and they in turn interrogated their kids. Each neighbor claimed innocence, but just knew that they could find out who did it. Later, as I was cleaning the mud off the car, one of my neighbors came over to help, and to my
embarassment, pointed out that a barn swallow had been building a nest in the garage above my car. (They build their nests out of mud). Apparently the nest broke from the ledge it was plastered on and "splat" right onto the truck lid and roof of my car. Of course through all of this I did manage to avoid "stupid human trick" number 4 (calling the police and filing a complaint) and number 5 (not waxing my car). The mud, picked up and deposited by little birdy feet, washed off, leaving no marks. Now I keep the garage door closed and the car cover on. With any luck it will stop raining sometime this year and I can dare the pigeons to------- , well you get the picture.
By the way I did go back to the neighbors and apologized to their kids for my wrongful assumption. Do you ever just feel like and idiot?
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Joined: Jun 2001
Posts: 7,446
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From: West Mids.
Close call there!
I remember a pub landlord who put the takings from 3 days trade in a bag on a shelf behind the bar. He then went to bed leaving the barman, a faithful old employee of many years, to wash the glasses and lock up. In the morning the money was gone! He promptly called the cops and the barman was hauled in and questioned. After angrily protesting his innocence, he was released and went to the pub where he had a very heated stand-up row with the landord.
In the middle of the row, the landlord's labrador dog walked into the room and dumped a pile of chewed
I remember a pub landlord who put the takings from 3 days trade in a bag on a shelf behind the bar. He then went to bed leaving the barman, a faithful old employee of many years, to wash the glasses and lock up. In the morning the money was gone! He promptly called the cops and the barman was hauled in and questioned. After angrily protesting his innocence, he was released and went to the pub where he had a very heated stand-up row with the landord.
In the middle of the row, the landlord's labrador dog walked into the room and dumped a pile of chewed
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Joined: Sep 2002
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From: Dragon country
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