Morris

The minister started his Children’s Sermon with a question, “Who knows what a Resurrection is?”
Without missing a beat a young boy says, “If you have one lasting more than 4 hours call your physician.
The pastor is still laughing.

Morris

One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to the part of the story where Chicken Little tried to warn the farmer. She read, ".... and so Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, "The sky is falling, the sky is falling!"
The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do you think that farmer said?"
One little girl raised her hand and said, "I think he said: 'Shit! A talking chicken!'"
The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.

Morris

When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three year old came into the room when I was just getting ready to get into the shower. She said, "Mommy, you are getting fat!"
I replied, "Yes, honey, remember Mommy has a baby growing in her tummy."
"I know," she replied, but what's growing in your butt?"

Morris

A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he'd found a cat, but it was dead.
"How do you know that the cat was dead?" she asked her pupil.
"Because I pissed in its ear and it didn't move," answered the child innocently.
"You did WHAT?!?" the teacher exclaimed in surprise.
"You know, “explained the boy, "I leaned over and went 'Pssst!' and it didn't move."

dlq04

^ Kids say the damnest things!

NNY S2k

Thanks for todays laughs.
Levi

NNY S2k

Hooters and golf
Two guys grow up together but after college one moves to New York State, the other to Florida. They agree to meet every ten years in Vero Beach and play golf.
At age 30, they finish their round of golf and go to lunch.

"Where you wanna go?"

"Hooters."

"Why?"

"Well, you know, they got the broads with the big racks and the tight shorts and the legs!"

"OK."

Ten years later at age 40 they play.

"Where you wanna go?"

"Hooters."

"Why?

"Well, you know, they got cold beer and the big screen TVs and everybody has a little action on the games."

"OK."

Ten years later at age 50 they play a round of golf.

"Where you wanna go?"

"Hooters."

"Why?"

"The food is pretty good and there is plenty of parking!"

"OK."

At age 60 they play a round of golf.

"Where you wanna go?"

"Hooters."

"Why?"

"Wings are half price!"

"Ok"

At age 70 they play a round of golf.

"Where you wanna go?"

"Hooters."

"Why?

"They have 6 handicapped parking spaces right by the door."

"OK."

At age 80 they play a round of golf.

"Where you wanna go?"

"Hooters."

"Why?"

"We've never been there before."





Levi

MsPerky

trapper

Scooterboy