Have you smiled today
Thread Starter
Registered User
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 3,622
Likes: 0
From: Kansas City
Have you smiled today
So a penguin is driving along and his car rumbles and starts clunking. Being a penguin he doesn't know what's wrong so he stops at the first garage he sees.
The mechanic tells him it will be a few minutes before he can look at it, so the penguin looks around and sees an ice cream shop. Since it is hot out the penguin decides to go get some ice cream.
He is sitting there enjoying a nice vanilla cone when he sees the mechanic flagging him over, so he waddles over and the mechanic says, "You blew a seal." The penguin wipes away the melted ice cream on his beak and says "No, it's vanilla ice cream"
So Mickey finally does the unmentionable. He goes to a divorce lawyer to discuss his situation with Minnie. After going through all the papers, the lawyer turns to Mickey and says, "You can't divorce your wife because she's silly, Mickey. That's just not right. Think of all you'd lose by doing that!"
"I didn't say she was silly," Mickey replied. "I said she was ****ing Goofy."
A koala bear from Australia decided to take a vacation to New York City to enjoy a different culture. After arriving in New York and getting settled in at his hotel, the koala bear decided to take a walk. After touring this adventurous city for a few hours he noticed several women on the side of the street strutting their stuff.
The koala bear approached one of them and asked, "What are you doing?"
The woman replied "I'm a prostitute. Are you looking for a good time?"
The koala bear immediately replied yes.
"Do you wanna have sex?" the prostitute asked.
"Well, sure. I mean, I did come here to live up the true New York experience," said the bear with a grin on his face.
The prostitute grabbed the bear's hand and directed him to her apartment where they had sex. Soon after, the koala bear got out of bed and proceeded to the door.
The prostitute yelled, "Where are you going?"
The bear told her that he was done and it was time for him to go. "I'm a prostitute. You have to pay me!"
The bear said with a disgusted tone, "Since when do I have to pay for sex?"
The prostitute replied, "Everyone I have sex with has to pay. It's in the dictionary, look it up."
The koala bear agreed to pull out a dictionary from one of her shelves to look up the word "prostitute." It said, "A woman who has sex in exchange for money."
The prostitute immediately started to chuckle and asked for her money. The koala bear then remarked, "Okay, to make it even, why don't you look up the word koala bear?"
The prostitute grabbed the dictionary and looked up "koala bear." The bear said, "Go ahead, read it aloud!"
The prostitute read the definition out loud. "An Australian animal that eats bush and leaves."
The mechanic tells him it will be a few minutes before he can look at it, so the penguin looks around and sees an ice cream shop. Since it is hot out the penguin decides to go get some ice cream.
He is sitting there enjoying a nice vanilla cone when he sees the mechanic flagging him over, so he waddles over and the mechanic says, "You blew a seal." The penguin wipes away the melted ice cream on his beak and says "No, it's vanilla ice cream"
So Mickey finally does the unmentionable. He goes to a divorce lawyer to discuss his situation with Minnie. After going through all the papers, the lawyer turns to Mickey and says, "You can't divorce your wife because she's silly, Mickey. That's just not right. Think of all you'd lose by doing that!"
"I didn't say she was silly," Mickey replied. "I said she was ****ing Goofy."
A koala bear from Australia decided to take a vacation to New York City to enjoy a different culture. After arriving in New York and getting settled in at his hotel, the koala bear decided to take a walk. After touring this adventurous city for a few hours he noticed several women on the side of the street strutting their stuff.
The koala bear approached one of them and asked, "What are you doing?"
The woman replied "I'm a prostitute. Are you looking for a good time?"
The koala bear immediately replied yes.
"Do you wanna have sex?" the prostitute asked.
"Well, sure. I mean, I did come here to live up the true New York experience," said the bear with a grin on his face.
The prostitute grabbed the bear's hand and directed him to her apartment where they had sex. Soon after, the koala bear got out of bed and proceeded to the door.
The prostitute yelled, "Where are you going?"
The bear told her that he was done and it was time for him to go. "I'm a prostitute. You have to pay me!"
The bear said with a disgusted tone, "Since when do I have to pay for sex?"
The prostitute replied, "Everyone I have sex with has to pay. It's in the dictionary, look it up."
The koala bear agreed to pull out a dictionary from one of her shelves to look up the word "prostitute." It said, "A woman who has sex in exchange for money."
The prostitute immediately started to chuckle and asked for her money. The koala bear then remarked, "Okay, to make it even, why don't you look up the word koala bear?"
The prostitute grabbed the dictionary and looked up "koala bear." The bear said, "Go ahead, read it aloud!"
The prostitute read the definition out loud. "An Australian animal that eats bush and leaves."
everyday the flightless bird doesn't rejoin us. 
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
The Raptor
The Corner
11
Apr 25, 2003 08:06 PM