If you were in a serious relationship for around two years, give or take, how long should it take you to get over her. Something can't be right if months later I still think about her almost everyday. Smart ass answers are welcome, I like to laugh, but someone post at least one serious answer.

 

Phew! two posts on relationships on one day!

There are so many variables in getting the right answer (even then I am not sure if there is one).

Was she good-looking in universal sense of the word
How many months is 'months later'?
Was this your first serious relationship?
Why did you break up?
Is she seeing someone else 'already'?
How much have you seen her after the breakup?
Have you two decided to stay friends even when you are not capable of doing so?

Some other questions may be:
Are you a social reject?
Are you very unattractive and you believe that your chance of meeting another woman is very remote?


Seriously though, and I would imagine you get this from your family and friends everyday: "GET OVER IT AND SEE OTHER WOMEN"

 

It takes as long as you are willing to let it take.

If you are willing to let go and move on then you need to do so. If you have things lying around that make you think of her and all you do is sit around the house instead of going out and getting to know other people then it will linger. I am making it seem simple but sometimes people just make it seem harder then it is.

 

You probably have unanswered questions (by that, you haven't gotten your "closure"). But if you don't, get rid of everything that reminds you of her. Go out and have fun. You have of make an effort to forget her and move on. And when you make that effort, it'll be easier to move on. But in the end, if you still see that you can't live your life without her, talk to her. Otherwise, make a decision to not think about her and try to have fun. The rest will fall into place. Good luck.

 

I don't believe it's a question of wanting to get over someone or not that defines how long it takes, as Dan suggested.

I've been separated from my ex for over 2 1/2 years, divorced for 1 1/2. We were together for 8 years, and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about him. It's not a constant thought the way it once was, but he is still in my conscious thought process at some point daily. Believe me, I WANT to get him out of my head, but it just isn't that simple when someone has been a part of your life for that long. I believe that getting over someone takes time; you won't wake up one morning and not think about her anymore, but it will be more of a waning thing.

Good luck to you...

 

Thanks for the opinions, we've been broken up since late september and this is still an unusual experience, as it was my first serious relationship. I called her last night just to check on her but i found out she is out of town. I'm in the Marine Corps reserve and am being told i will be leaving soon so i won't to do something before then. But enough rambling, thanks again.

 

JMP, you only broke up in late Sept.? And it was a 2 year thing? It

 

Alright, even though I only skimmed through the rest of your posts I'll give *MY* advice on this... :-)

The supposed amount of time is 1/2 the time of the relationship.

I was with one of my ex's for 3 years. It was really bad in the middle and bad at the end. I don't really believe I got any "closure" and that made things worse. I went for 9 months afterward without a date, etc. Then started dating around yadda yadda yadda... Skip forward quite a few years and I met my current. Now I've been with her about 4 years. That doesn't mean I don't think about my old ex and I don't miss her. You can't ever FORGET, that's just part of life and that's what makes breaking up hard. There are certain things that you remember fondly and miss about people; and if there are a lot of those certain things in your everyday life it's going to be harder to get move on. Try changing your routine, going out more often/less often.

Keep yourself busy, that's my best advice!

 

I agree with the 1/2 time of the relationship formula. After my ex dumped me after six months of a (short but intense) relationship I spent the first three months obsessing about him. Then suddenly a light went off. magically I began to realize that hey, our relationship wasn't that great in the first place.

I recalled times where he didn't treat me like I should be treated, and after standing back and piecing some clues together, I discovered that he wasn't faithful. Then I realized that I could do much better... and did!

Get out there and grab a spoon.