My wife has a friend who has a real problem, mostly of her own making. She has been having an affair with her boss and now wants it to end. They never met outside the office (he was afraid they might be seen) and only got together after hours. He continues to pursue her and she is afraid of the affair being discovered by someone else. She is scared to death that her job is in jeopardy. What is her recourse here? Both she and her boss are married, by the way.

 

well she shouldn't fear her job be in jeopardy...if anyone should fear that it's her boss. even if it's consentual he can be brought up on sexual harassment charges since he's her boss. one of the main reasons why you "don't shit where you eat". she should tell him it's over and if he threatens to fire her she screams sexual harassment and lives of the court settlement for the rest of her life =).

 

This can only come to a bad end for everyone involved, especially since they both are married. I can almost guarantee her husband will find out. Attention everyone: Don't be a dope and do this!!!

Continued pursuit by a superior after advances are rejected does constitute sexual harassment and is against the law. It's called a hostile work environment. Another form of sexual harassment is that she was negatively impacted by her rejection of the advances (ie. didn't get a promotion.)

She does need to take some affirmative action now (assuming the affair was consensual). This would constitute notifying the superior and either the human resources office or her bosses boss. Preferably, this should be done in writing. If the company is small or the supervisor is the owner, she'll need to work with an attorney (and btw, I'm not one.) She shouldn't expect to cash in on ending a consensual affair.

Here's a link that may be of some assistance:
http://my.shrm.org/hrmagazine/articles/def...age=1096COV.HTM

Disclaimer: A large proportion of people meet and fall in love at work. It's OK. Done correctly, there's no chance of liability. Sexual harassers are scum. Like most workplace things people wring their hands about, there is little liklihood that you'll be found guilty if you are innocent and don't try to cover up. When making workplace decisions, always do the right thing and occasionally take your lumps!

 

Both married, Hmmmmmmmmmm.............Well, I have to say that both have alot to learn about loyalty to their choosen mate. Personally, I'd have to say that both are going to have to admit that they have had such an affair to their spouses. Now, if neither is regretful of their actions that's another story. Sounds like, neither have thought about their personal actions and self control. I agree with J on this one, it can only get far worse. You can see where this is headed. The only advice I can give in this situation is, both better own up and tell the truth and seriously mean it. What happens after is only speculation on my part. Apart from this, everyone must hold themselves accountable for their actions. It's going to hurt, especially if they care. I think the young lady has had second thoughts about her actions. Either way she needs to be up front with her huband before all this information is put out on the street. I wouldn't want to be in her shoes.

 

[QUOTE]Originally posted by lvs2k
[B].

 

Thanks,guys.

 

FYI--
Talked to Suzanne who informs me that the latest statistic of married people who met at work is 60% (including us.)

 

[QUOTE]Originally posted by lvs2k
[B]My wife has a friend who has a real problem, mostly of her own making. She has been having an affair with her boss and now wants it to end.