Granted, you get a whole cow...with mad cow disease.

I wish i could get some sleep.

 

Granted. You dream about gay sex with Tom Cruise.

I wish I had a good Belgian beer.

 

Granted, it is so big and so good, you drink it until you die of alcohol poisoning.

I wish I was impervious to disease and indestructible.

 

You live forever and end up floating alone in space after the earth destructs.

I wish I could fly.

 

Granted, you ultimately end up with a tremendous fear of heights.

I wish I could quit smoking cigs.

 

Granted, but you fill the void with crack cocaine and spend 35 years behind bars with a guy named Buba.

I wish I could stay and play this game instead of going to my wife's grandfather's birthday party right now.

 

You stay while your wife goes, meets Fabio-a like, and has tantric exhaustive sex with him, then divorces you and takes half your stuff, including your car.

I wish I was chilling with Jolie, Alba, Hilton, and Theron at the same time... naked.

 

Granted. Mr. Jolie, Mr. Alba, Mr. Hilton, and Mr. Theron are all pleased to meet you.

I wish I had a billion dollars

 

Granted...You get this lump sum in 100 dollar bill stacks and are crushed by the weight of it when it falls on you. You had no time to write a will so it all goes to the government.


I wish i had a nice steak right now.

 

Granted. A male escort will arrive at your house shortly...

I wish this thread will go on for a while