Hey all,

My GF and I (we

 

yeah, we have seperate accounts and a joint account. we both put in the same percentage of our pay into the joint....enough to cover all our bills plus some that we can then move into a joint savings. then we have our seperate accounts to that we use for personal purchases mainly, unless something big comes up and we have to dip into those as well for joint purchases. since i just bought a new car, we pay for that with the joint, but i've been putting a bit more of my money into the joint to help cover the cost, since it is my car.

it works well for us. we don't ever really fight over money.

 

from the married people i've talked to, the ones who have a joint account as well as separate accounts are the happiest

that is, if you are sure you want the woman to have access to any money

 

i am not married, but separate accounts sound tricky. okay as long as they are insignificant enough that any partner could not make a decision which would impact the other. or, on the flip side, how serious can the marriage be if both persons have entirely separate retirement accounts?

fwiw, most everyone in my immediate and extended family does the fully shared thing (all of the generation before me at least...which would be 11 marriages of over 25 years).

but shit, i am single

 

fwiw all the younger couples i know have a shared account for joint stuff like house/grocery/ maybe cars and then they keep separate accounts for their own stuff.

people get pissed when they feel like they are contributing more and getting less... better if shared accounts are only for things that both of you use, as opposed to just lumping it all together. just my 2cents

 

It sounds like you're wanting direction about how to specifically deal with your money, but I'll suggest you think about another aspect. Everyone has views about money and its importance (it proves your worth as a person; it's a survival tool; it provides emotional and other security, etc.) and those views heavily influence how we mange our money. I suspect that 99% of a couple's arguments about money come from differing views about/values put on money. So ask yourself what money really means to you and the role it plays in your life. And then talk with your gf about what money means to her. You may not be able to predict what you'll fight about, but if you know what each of your views are, you'll have a better chance of resolving the issue.


As far as the practical stuff goes, I'm inclined to say some shared financial things make sense, but obviously it needs to be something you're both comfortable with. Also consider the possible outcomes if the relationship doesn't work out.

 

Im single... but it seems to me like having a joint account for things that benefit both of you, and paying bills and then separate accounts for doing your own thing would be the way to go.

 

Separate accounts, no question. You will probably be the one pissed off in the end otherwise.

Joint account for group bills and large group purchases such as a new car. You can each put in an equal amount into this account on whatever time basis to save for such purchases. It's up to you to decide what all gets covered in the group account. Like, if you have a nicer car, is she going to want to fork out extra to help make your payment? Do you want to pay half of her iPhone data plan when your cell phone bill is $30/mo? and so on.

There are some nice tax benefits to planning retirement together and using joint accounts, so you have to research that and make your own decision on that.

 

Seperate accounts, trust me on this one. Then have a bill account, where
both of you contribute, this works the best for us.

 

psh.

you are either in it for life or not ( it working out or not is a separate ordeal). if both partners are committed long term, then i find it very hard to argue against everything being shared. if you are pissed off because your wife is constantly spending an unequal share of the monies on herself, you should ask yourself why she married in the first place.