just have everything go to your account and give her an allowance

 

i pay per sandwich

 

I don't know how people who seperate their money do it. Whatever you do, talk it out and agree to it first. My wife and I pool everything. I make significantly more than her, but we agreed together that she'd work part time and be a full time mom. It works for us in that we talk about major spending together. So far it's worked well.

 

Unless you got some kind of prenup may as well have shared accounts IMO

 

I couldn't imagine having seperate accounts. We pool everything but we each take a weekly allowance.

 

separate accounts but I pay for EVERYTHING, including her expenses. It has been this way since we were engaged 2 years ago.

 

I agree 1000%... My wife and I have had a single shared account since we moved in together 10 years ago, and that was 8 years before we were married. If you're going to share accounts, there has to be complete fiscal transparency, but only one of you (the person who is better at it) should handle the finances. Consider it one of your chores. With us, I handle the money, pay bills, etc. My wife isn't a shop-a-holic... I get the feeling she almost feels guilty for spending money on herself, even though we earn roughly the same salary. Aside from her day job, my wife also sells artwork she creates... so I set up a separate account for her with proceeds from art; it's like her "play money". But if you do something like that, the joint account should hold the majority of your funds.

The way I look at it, if you keep separate accounts, you're planning for failure. Why do that?

 

Been married nine years. We have never shared a bank account. At one point we split the bills. Some are in her name and some in mine. Sometimes I pick up a major purchase and sometimes she does. It's not a big deal as neither of us is fussy about money. She is fiscally responsible, as am I. We have NEVER had a fight over spending habits.

Will, we're not planning on failure. That's an ignorant statement. You have no idea why we do what we do or our philosophy on money and life. You may not understand it, but it certainly isn't your place to tell me what is right or wrong or what my future may hold. If you would like to understand, I'm happy to share my experience.

 

sharing responsibility while maintaining some personal control over your finances...yes, clearly that implies a lack of trust that will lead to failure.

 

I'm not trying to tell you what's right and wrong. "The way I see it" means from my perspective, my point of view, my experience. YMMV. From the range of answers in this thread to the original question, it would seem there are different strokes for different folks. Obviously some people can make it work with separate accounts; however, I am not one of them and just can't relate.