Bingo!

Weren't you the one who posted a while back about the break-up with the same woman? I don't think there's a future between you two since you guys are not seeing eye-to-eye on many different issues. There is a serious maturity issue with her and maybe some anger/maturity issues with you as well (don't know the whole story).

Like another poster said, arm yourself with good legal advice first and decide what you really want to do with the pregnancy stuff. Be prepared to live up to your end of the obligations if you and her decide to go through with it. It's a tough road ahead but I'd applaud you if you are man enough to face it. Good luck to you.

 

Gentleman -- she is pregnant. Whether or not she chooses to keep the child is certainly her decision, even though it takes two to tango.

In the meantime, he behavior shouldn't be of any surprise. From the first week of a pregnancy, the body is flushing with hormones and allot of stuff is going on internally. The changes are so dramatic that most women know they're pregnant before they ever buy a test kit.

Pregnancy can cause all sorts of "strange" behavior, but mostly emotional (outside of the vomiting). So if the gal goes Jekyll/Hyde on you, just lay low like in a tornado at it will pass.

She's also got to be big-time stressing over the abortion decision. Hey, women sometimes die during the procedure, and mistakes happen and she could be rendered sterile. These thoughts are rather unpleasant.

Regardless of whether or not you are meant to stay together, I would just ask that you support her throughout this "ordeal." She's probably terrified.

 

She sounds like she's not ready to be a mother, not really mature enough yet for a relationship.

You need a clean break.

Abortion is a big deal, but bringing a child into your screwed up relationship with a woman who already shows she doesn't car about the child is worse. Fetal alcohol syndrome is a big deal if she keep drinking and drinks enough to cause it. Regardless, emotions are high for you. Try to make the logical decision and later when time seperates you and the emotions are gone you'll know you made the right decision.

 

haven't you already posted at least two of these types of threads about the same girl? she sounds like a royal PITA. she doesn't like you anymore.... and having a kid with her won't make her like you again. i know that's harsh, but realize that the sooner you move on and put this crappy relationship behind you, the sooner you can get into a GOOD relationship. don't you want a girl who will return your calls/texts? who won't play games with you? who doesn't act immature when she senses some type of competition from another girl? who doesn't prioritize partying with her friends over your relationship? believe it or not, there is a girl out there who will give you all that and more. the only problem is that you're stuck with this dumb broad... and if you have a kid with her, you'll be stuck with her FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.

i think i remember you telling us that she's cheated on you before... after that you posted a thread about how you finally broke up. and apparently you guys got back together after all that. it sort of sounds like she's met someone again, and he's probably hanging out at all these parties she's going to (the ones that it sounds like she doesn't invite YOU to.) she's stringing you along... she only wants you around when she doesn't have any other prospective love interests. when she does have other prospects, she wants nothing to do with you.

i don't know how much clearer she needs to make it for you to realize that SHE DOESN'T LIKE YOU. on friday she picks a fight with you... she knows there's going to be something going on friday night, and she definitely doesn't want to miss out on the partying by having to be a good girlfriend and hang out with you, so she picks a fight and blames it on you "not appreciating her." which is complete and utter bullshit, by the way. don't let her blame you for things that are obviously her problem. saturday morning, she once again picks a fight with you to ensure that she won't have to hang out with you that night. AND OF COURSE, on sunday morning, she acts like she misses you because she knows there probably isn't going to be anything better going on sunday night. but wait, her friend shows up, so now she does have something better to do, so once again you get kicked to the curb. stop fooling yourself... the more you try to work things out with her, the more she'll push you away.

i think i've told you this before... but your relationship sounds really similar to my relationship with my high-school sweetheart/ex-fiance. i was the emotionally abusive girlfriend, i cheated on him, he smothered me so i was a bitch to him all the time and for some crazy reason that made him try even harder. deep down inside i wanted to break up with him, but i was too much of a coward to just come right out and do it, because i was scared that i wouldn't find someone else, and i wanted to keep him around as my back-up plan. i did all this crazy shit to him, i played games with him, i picked fights with him, i hung out with other guys, i partied all weekend without him, etc. it finally got to a point where i was done trying to make him break up with me by doing shitty things to him, and i finally got the nerve to just break up with him, and he went off the deep end. i actually ended up having to get a stalking order on him - he was calling me 60+ times a day, he'd wait in front of my house for me at night, he broke into my house, he tried to run over my guy friends with his truck, among other things. there's no justification for my actions, and none for his (he went absolutely CRAZY when we broke up). 2

 

Good grief!

They're both in their early 20's and they both got themselves into a real pickle. Lack of maturity? Should of thought of that before they started ****ing! People need to take accountability for their actions...she wasn't a PITA while he was in bed with her, was she?

This is what is known as consequences for actions.

SUCK IT UP -- this is how some people learn to grow up FAST.

 

Holy crap! Better words have not been written regarding this topic.

Take his advice to heart, you will be thanking yourself when you really are in the mindset to start a family (with your WIFE).

 

[QUOTE=f1_fanz,Jun 11 2007, 08:16 AM] Regardless of whether or not you are meant to stay together, I would just ask that you support her throughout this "ordeal."

 

I see your point, I can't however respond. This thread is probably going to eventually get closed because of the abortion issue.

All I can say is that they are not ready or fit to be parents. If the girl has the baby then she should give the baby up for adoption to people who are right to raise him/her.

 

abort, break up, and move on... honestly, these threads are pointless because you will end up acting on your feelings instead of common sense. i'm speaking from experience and just here for support.

NOTE: think with your head and not with your heart.

 

but sometimes deciding to have the baby (especially if it's only because they think it will save their relationship) isn't the mature thing to do.

sometimes the more mature thing to do is realize that they're not ready to bring a child into the world...