trapper

^ Guess you failed chemistry in high school.......!!!!!

boltonblue

Dave go search avagadro's number

kgf3076

Awww, you took all the fun out of it.

dlq04

Yep, I'm a little slow and still don't get the joke. The only moles I know of are tearing up my backyard.

Matt_in_VA

Yes, I did. It was a revenge grade. But she got me back. When we did the experiment separate Oxygen from water, I did the opposite and separated the hydrogen. When the teacher came around with the smoldering splint to have the oxygen re-ignite it. The splint was blown out of her hand as the Hydrogen exploded. She got me back in two ways. The first was having me hold a spoon over a bunson burner with a sugar cube on it, to have a solid turn into a liquid, then into gas. The spoon got so hot that it burned my fingers. Then she gave me a failing grade to boot.

trapper

Meals On Wheels - Montana Style

dlq04

^ Good one. Sent this to a friend who delivers them.

Morris

Subject: This and That


The closest I ever got to a 4.0 in college was my blood alcohol content.

I live in my own little world, but it's OK. Everyone knows me here.

I saw a very large woman wearing a sweatshirt with "Guess" on it. I said, "Left Tackle?"

I'm old, and I don't do drugs. I find I get the same effect just by standing up really fast.

I don't like political jokes. I've seen too many get elected.

The most precious thing we have is life, yet it has absolutely no trade-in value.

If life deals you lemons, make lemonade. If life deals you tomatoes, make Bloody Marys.

My Best Shopping tip: You can get shoes for a buck at bowling alleys.

Every day I beat my previous record of consecutive days I've stayed alive.

No one ever says, "It's only a game!" when their team's winning.

Ever notice that people who spend money on beer, cigarettes and lottery tickets are always complaining about being broke and not feeling well?

Isn't having a smoking section in a restaurant like having a peeing section in a swimming pool?

Marriage changes passion . . suddenly you're in bed with a relative.

Why is it that most nudists are people you don't want to see naked?

Snowmen fall from Heaven un-assembled.

Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants.

I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't need the freakin' class!

Don't argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.

Wouldn't you know it! Brain cells come and brain cells go, but FAT cells live forever.

Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school, but they can in prison?

buckeyesue

Morris, those are good!

This one is my favorite:

"I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't need the freakin' class! "

dlq04

x2 LOL