I think RB might have posted this.

--
A couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very
much
in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old
buddies.
So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."

Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.

"I'm going to the bar, Pretty! Face. I'm going to have a beer."

The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the frige
and showed him 25 different
kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan,
India, etc.

The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think
of saying was, "Yes,!
Lollipop.... but at the bar... you know...they have frozen glasses. "

He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by
saying, "You want a frozen
glass, Puppy Face?" She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen
that she was
getting chills just holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar
they have those hors d'oeuvres
that are really delicious...I won't be long. I'll be ri! ght back. I
promise...OK?"

"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the oven and took out
5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs n blankets,
mushroom caps, and pork strips.

"But my sweet honey...at the bar....you know, there's swearing, dirty words
and all that...."

"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? "LISTEN UP DICKHEAD! SIT DOWN, SHUT THE
HELL UP, DRINK YOUR
DAMN BEER IN YOUR DAMN FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR F #$% ING HORS D'OEUVRES
BECAUSE
YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING TO A F #$% KING BAR! THAT SHIT IS OVER...GOT
IT, ASSHOLE?"

....and, they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story?

 

 

 

That touches my

 

Across your nose?