WHy can't i get my brokerage account setup?

 

Well, I'm going to do what I do best, and make some wild (and nominally-educated) guesses:

1. Your system does not meet the ridiculous compatibility requirements of your brokerage. History has shown me they're finicky. Check the versions of all the software up-and-down stream

2. Check your e-mail and browser settings for spam blockers, port blockers, and any other settings that may prevent you from accessing the site on their terms.

3. You're trying to broker s. Human trafficking is a pretty serious crime. You should probably stop.

4. You're attempting to set something up with a brokerage that may be going out of business. Corroborate you online attempts with human interaction.

 

Oh yeah, nearly forgot. . .

 

WHy do I suddenly crave shrimp cocktail?

 

Shrimp cocktail is tasty.

 

How long does the average cold last?

 

With apologies to Unkie Trunkie I feel compelled to ask:

Why would you be setting up a brokerage account anywhere right now? Especially in the which we all know to be composed of even less substance than Wall Street.

Put your money in a tin can, store it under your mattress, and :fap: yourself into a near comotose state as you whack to the rhythm of a constantly declining dollar.

But I could be wrong.

About the rhythm not the facts of the matter.

 

Unkie Trunkie, why isn't the fact that I bought 30k worth of stock this morning a good thing? Fark if i were to sell right now I'm up 5k

 

The average cold lasts, on average, the average amount of time for an average cold.

 

Raymo, Raymo, Raymo. . . your penance? Take out $300 in Euros. . . and leave it in the collection plate at a local Church.

Raj and I are young enough where this isn't really an economic catastrophe; just a fire sale on blue chips and penny stocks.

could be. . .