All week I've gone to the rest room at work so I can chunk the deuce, and all week nobody has been in there, thus making the deed possible to...do. However, all day today, every time but once have I been able to go into the restroom without the stall door being closed and occupied. We have one stall at work for males, and having to wait for them to finish is really chapping my ass.

I'm writing this as I squeeze in my turtle head, because someone has been in the stall for around 30 minutes and I wanted to vent my frustration.

Questions then, I guess, to kill time while I wait.

How many stalls are at your work? Can you go if someone is in a stall next to you?

I'll go ahead and get these out of the way for ya'll.
DTR, NATS
I don't like you
teh phux goin on in dis thread
try hitting her
sharpest spoon on the shelf
etc.

 

Yesterday I was dropping the kids off at the pool in the basement bathroom here at work which probably has 10 stalls on the left side, 12 on the right. I had taken refuge all the way on the end of the right side. There was one other patron situated mid way down the left side. Half way through the duty, some guy walks in and for some ****ed up reason, decided to take the stall right next to mine. Mind you, there were 11 other empty stalls on that side of the room. Our convo went like so

Me: 'Scuse me, I just...
Annoying shitter: Huh?
Me: I have to ask you, why'd you... wha... wha... why are you shitting... right there?
Annoying shitter: What?
Me: I mean... why'd you shit right next to me when you could like, choose a different stall.
Annoying shitter: Well, this toilet looked like I should shit in it. Why are you shitting there
Me: Well, no one was here when I chose this stall.
Annoying shitter: Oh, so you get to shit at the end and no one else does? Huh?
Me: No, it's just... I just...
Annoying shitter: This your stall? You have a special bond with this stall?
Me: No, I just thought that...
Annoying shitter: You the king of the bathroom?
Me: I'm sorry?
Annoying shitter: What?
Annoying shitter: You ****in' tree-hugger. IS THIS YOUR SPECIAL STALL?
Me: Never mind. Forget it, I really don't feel like gettin' stabbed today.






























well everything true but the convo still.. what the ****.

 

there is only one public men's restroom here at the dealership. if someone drops a scud you smell it before you open the door

i usually go down to the service lockeroom and drop the kids off since it's a less traveled room and they have reading materials

 

According to the bible, is this right?

 

Hmmmm - Trying to think back...

On the day after first registering with to s2ki.com, what did I post?

Was it:
'How do I open the gas lid?'

or:
'There's a secret compartment?!'

perhaps:
'I love this car!'

Oh that's right, I remember. It was to tell the sports car community at large my bowel movement concerns...

 

That's Groovy NeilNeil. It's not his first day by any stretch of the imagination.

 

The men's room on my floor at work has three stalls and one urinal. The one downstairs has two urinals and three stalls. The third floor has three stalls and two urinals. The basement is a one seater. I don't know about the fourth and fifth floors.
When I gotta go, I gotta go and pity the poor b@$t@rd next to me.

 

Oh. I stand corrected.

So the rumors of his untimely, um... whatever it was... were highly exaggerated?

 

Unfortunately, yes.

Way to keep a low profile on your first few days back GNN.

 

Droppin' da rhymes while droppin' da deuce
You cannot touch what I'm about to produce.
Brown and funky lord it reeks.
So funky stay in your nose for weeks.
You say it's crazy, I say no, it's 'nuts.'
After what I ate, there gonna be chunks
Breakin' da beat while breakin' a log.
It's so long it's gonna leave the shitter clogged.

Peanut Butter and MGD
Korea BBQ and Beef Jerkey
It's been brewin' for too damn long
Even I ain't ready for this bomb.
Gonna have some coffee
Gonna have some cheese
Greasy farts gonna signal me.

Oh lord, gonna have to run
4 squares in the corner to protect the buns
Gruntin' Groanin' I'm seeing the stars
Bracin' for impact with the ADA bars
With another grunt and the loudest howls
Moving that grogan and straining my bowels
Passing the stool and loosing my cool
The men's room is stinking like a bad high school

I thought I was dying; I was beginning to cry
The stars are fading, I wasn't gonna die
The perfect break, a hearty splash
I whisk a tear from the end of my eyelash
The cleanest pinch nothing left behind
Wipe my a$$ no evidence to find

A clean crime scene, to myself I told
But turned around, glanced in the bowl
Oh my god, Oh my god what have I done?
It's smelly nutty brown shell from my butt-gun.

I look through the crack from the stall
I glance to the mirror on the bathroom wall
Jump out fast, wash my hands
Gotta expedite my sinister plan

A giant grogan, a turd of fame.
Nobody caught me; NO WALK OF SHAME.