AgS2K

Dear Gentlemen,

I couldn't help but overhear part of your conversation as I left the Ben Franklin store this afternoon. You were standing outside talking together, undoubtedly discussing the recent events and their possible repercussions, much as everyone was doing this day across America and, indeed, the world.

I only heard three words, but those three words have since left me both frustrated and angry. Those three words were, "...and their airbases..."

I looked you, the speaker, in the eye at the mention of those three words. As would happen at such a time in any conversation on the street, you paused as I walked by looking at you. I don't really know what the expression on my face was. I would hope that it was one of simple curiousity or, better yet, the blank expression of one walking along his way. But pause in your conversation you did.

Let me explain why I am both frustrated and angry; a condition which has my hands shaking as they ball into fists and tears run from my eyes as they are squeezed tight.

You see; I honestly don't know what I should have done just then. I was raised in a kind and loving family and I firmly believe in the freedoms upon which our nation was formed. I have never hated anyone. If you were to come to know me through social or work situations, you would think of me as a really nice person with a great sense of humor.

But the events of the past week, I'm afraid, have changed me and my country. It is my deepest wish that it not be permanent, but I honestly can't say for certain.

You see, we're both going to be rather paranoid and scared and frustrated and angry for some time to come. I have just learned on the news that two of the people involved in the attack on our country were wanted in connection with the attack on the USS Cole. If this turns out to be true, and quite frankly I've stopped believing what I hear on the news until it holds up for at least two days, it means that two men who were on the FBI's watch list were allowed to enter our country.

How am I to know who you are or what your conversation was really about? I was taught to believe in the inherent good in all people. I believe that if people are evil, it is only because the conditions in which they have found themselves are too much for the goodness inside them to prevail.

I want to believe you were only discussing what everyone is discussing these days. I want to believe that you have chosen to live in this country because of the opportunities for a better life for you and your family. I don't want to believe that I may have walked past two men capable of doing what we all saw on Tuesday.

But I honestly don't know anymore. If you thought of me as innocent before, I say I no longer am. If you felt America was a wonderful, welcoming place, I fear it no longer will be.

So if you saw anger in my eyes as I walked past, and you know it to be undeserved, please understand what I am feeling now and forgive me.

And to all the people of the world, I ask for your understanding in the months, and possibly years, to come. If Amercia ceases to be the open, wonderful place it was, I ask that you remember what we were so as time goes by, you can remind us and help us become that way again.

-Steve, a really nice guy with a great sense of humor.

SilverFog

Steve -- very thought-provoking. Thanks for sharing that with us.

Can I ask a question? Would your reaction have been different had they said:

"...and our airbases..." ?

Hopefully theirs was just a semantic slip, and they are not currently enjoying the sunshine and freedom of standing on Western soil while pledging allegiance somewhere else.

naishou

Don't you think it's just possible that they were talking about Pakistan (who may be forced to allow the US to use their bases to attack Afghanistan)? Best not to leap to conclusions. It seems that it's you who took the word "their" to refer to the USA. Out of context, I don't see why there's any such link.

Takashi KazuMori

The OT board is a good place to find "open diaries". Too bad they most likely won't be around to read it. So this is more addressed to people on the OT board.

AgS2K

The fact that they could have been talking about ANYTHING is exactly my point. I don't know what they were talking about, there is no way for me to know what they were talking about, and I will never know what they were talking about.

It is the realization that the events that occured last Tuesday have me questioning what I heard that has struck me so. The change I have seen in me will be reflected in America as a whole in the weeks to come.

It is necessary for our security that these changes take place, but it is still a sad thing to have to have happen.

gregstevens

I understood your point here, Steve and I agree. This whole thing makes you question things so much that you just don't have any answers anymore. It's frustrating, it's maddening and it's tragic, it brings tears to your eyes and a hollowness in you chest at a second's notice. It's crazy that the most basic and ordinary things in day to day life are called to question, yet I'm confident your experience is going to be repeated millions of times over.

This whole mess has caused an entirely new perspective on life and from this point forward, things will never ever be as they were only a matter of days ago.

The effects of this are deeply profound and I am encouraged by the can-do attitude that really shows the true and unique spirit of the American people. It was always there and it's sad that it took something like this to make us remember that we are a nation of fighters, but those mf'ers rocked our souls to the very core and life will never be the same again. I still awaken each morning thinking that it's all just a horrible dream, until I go and turn on the radio or tv and find that I am sadly mistaken in that feeling.

This all makes our problems with differentials and intakes seem laughingly inane.

airgate

Steve:

It still amazes me on how something so horrific can come about in a matter of minutes. . .how our entire lives as we know it can be changed forever!

The American Patriotism that is being shown is overwhelming and necessary, it is however a sad thing to see that a tradgedy of this magnitude is what prompted us to look deep inside ourselves and realize the very truth that we are not as safe as we would like to believe!

That there are individuals and groups completely against us. For our beliefs, way of life and the very thing we offer to everyone. . .our very freedom! It is true what you speak of. . .this has changed everything!

-Raul (airgate)