Granted. Now Apple is the only choice of home computers and there's no one left to make any software so all you can do is download music at ridiculous prices.


Granted. You forget about the old one right before she wins the lottery and wants you back. You find a new one, and her 14 kids too.


I wish America implemented a 4-day 40 hour work week.

 

Granted, you were already working 40 hours in 4 days, the extra 10 hours on the 5th day was overtime. no more overtime. now you can't make payments from the cutbacks. your house is foreclosed, and cars repossessed. your wife and kids leave you for your best friend, because he isn't a deadbeat, and he knows how she likes it, as he has been giving it to her for years. you lose your job due to your unstable home life, and become a bum on the side of the freeway off ramp begging for change. I pull up and throw a handfull of rocks at you and yell, "get a job you maggot!" you cry when you see I am driving your old car.

I wish gas/water/milk were cheaper.

 

Fuckin' Ouch man!


Granted. They are cheaper but you become lactose intolerant, allergic to water and you ended up buying an electric car before the gas prices dropped.




I wish that I got paid to be a

 

Granted: then you get a scortching case of HIV and are kicked out of the industry.


I wish it were April 2009 right now.

 

Granted. Obama is in office, he increases your taxes, and you can't afford that purty Lamborghini.




I wish my co-workers weren't such f

 

Granted, your co-workers are now super intelligent, and they have to get rid of dead wood. . . like you.


I wish to participate in the next Gumball 3000.

 

Granted. You wreck your loaner Ferrari shortly after the start and will have to work the rest of your life paying for it.


I wish my workday started later than it does, but still ended at a reasonable time.

 

Granted. You work 11-4. . . at the Arby's drive-thru.

I wish I had gone to Corner Con '03.

 

^Sorry, but you didn't corrupt. 11-4 at Arby's drive thru ain't so bad dude.

 

Car payments? House payments?

Your Desi sensibilities will run amuck.