Granted, you are narcaleptic. you can no longer work or drive your precious car as you now fall asleep out of no where with no warning

I wish the stock diff was tougher on the s2000

 

I don't want to corrupt that wish... I want that too!

 

Granted, but now that the stock diff is tougher, the transmission has to be replaced every 10,000 miles.



I wish these bitches would back up off me and let a player play.

 

Granted. Now that the Bitches have backed off, the only ones left to 'play' with are the hairy men. You drop the soap!





I wish I had eternal life.

 

Granted, also your body eternally ages too, and at 250 years old your bones have turned to chalk, you can't see, your weewee hasn't gotten excited in about 185 years, you have a full time diaper, you can't walk, you have bed sores, and this is the healthiest you are going to get. To top it off, 8d's great great great grand child is your care taker and every day walks in the room and


I wish to win the lottery at 250 million.

 

Granted. You have won 250M Turkish lira. Dinner at Denny's is on you.

I wish for the whole bloody thing to stop.

 

Granted. She stops having her period and congrats 8D, you're a papa!



I wish I was a professional test driver for Ferrari or Lamborghini.

 

Granted you are the test driver for the cows Lamborghini gets their leather from. You live in a hut amongst diseased savage natives in Africa and your best friend is a coke bottle that fell from the sky.



I wish I hadn't bumped my knee this morning on my desk which is now throbbing.

 

Why is your desk throbbing?

 

Because I banged my knee on it....duhhhhh










Jackass.